Imagination Jokes

This joke makes more sense if you can see it in person, but we'll give it a shot, anyway. Use your imagination. Why do the ladies love Jesus? Because he was hung like this!

What's that thing called when your crush likes you back?

Oh yeah. Imagination.

What's the difference between my bed and my imagination?

You aren't naked in my bed.

What is the opposite of Imagination?

I have no idea.

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How do you know accountants have no imagination?

They named a firm PricewaterhouseCoopers.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a man who cries while he pleasures himself?

A tearjerker

Why don't men want to go down on a woman first thing in the morning?

have you ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese?

Odd Jokes More Odd Jokes

What do Leonardo DiCaprio &amp anyone who buys a Powerball ticket have in common?

Their odds of winning are the same

Why does C-3PO always tell Han the Odds?

Because he can't even.

Santa Claus Jokes More Santa Claus Jokes

What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common?

They both leave little boys rooms with empty sacks.

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Harry Potter?

Santa would never free an elf.

Escape Jokes More Escape Jokes

How did 1337 Jesus escape his tomb?

X-Post from ProgrammerHumor) He used an encrypted key.

What did Bea Arthur whisper in her lover's ear?

An elaborate fantasy in which she is in prison and tries to escape by chewing through the bars of her cell.

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

How many girls a boy need to shoot a school?

None.

How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?

She fell out of the tree! I may not be a girl, but I'm blonde and find blonde jokes hilarious. xD

Shot Jokes More Shot Jokes

Why did the bros take a shot of alcohol together?

Because if one bro takes a shot, the other takes a slug! #Bromanceforlife #Dietogether

Why can't you get drunk with a sniper?

Because they are usually done after one or two shots.

Sense Jokes More Sense Jokes

Why didn't Darth Vader make it as a stand up comic?

Fans thought his sense of humor was a little too on the dark side.

What ever happened to the Energizer Bunny?

So the other day I'm talking to a friend about what happened to the Energizer Bunny. It's been quite sometime since I've seen him appear in a commercial. I was always under the impression that he "kept going." My friend proceeds to tell me the Energizer Bunny was arrested last year ,and they charged him with battery. Now it all makes sense.

Beautiful Woman Jokes More Beautiful Woman Jokes

Why did the Greeks want Helen back so bad?

Are you kidding She was the most beautiful woman in the world! Can you imagine what her sons would of looked like

What do you prefer, honey?

A smart woman or a beautiful woman -Neither sweetie, you know I only have eyes for you