Collect Jokes

How does Kurt Cobain collect his thoughts?

With a mop.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Which Greek God loved to collect animals?

Zoos

How did the dungeon keeper plan for retirement?

Collecting stocks and bonds.

How many of the commemorative state quarters have you collected?

I have 40.

What is a Furman freshman doing when he grasps at thin air?

Collecting his thoughts.

How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls?

Collect!

What has two arms and 14 legs?

Guy who collects legs.

Why did the Otter collect parts for his spaceship?

So he could go to otter space.

What am I supposed to do with this speeding ticket?

Officer, "Keep it, when you collect four of them, you get a bicycle."

What's the easiest way for a Gorilla hunter to make money?

Collect unemployment insurance!

How did rich people get their money?

They were calm and collected.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What's a dog favourite hobby ?

Collecting fleas !

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Shade Jokes More Shade Jokes

Why'd the dog sit in the shade?

He didn't want to be a hot dog!

Why are the avenues in Paris lined with trees?

A:Because Germans like to march in the shade.

Ram Jokes More Ram Jokes

What's the difference between 2015 and Moore's Law?

One's the year of the ram, the other is the ram of the year.

Why did the ram run off the cliff?

He didn't see the ewe turn.

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why did jesus not go to australia?

He couldn't find 3 wise men and a virgin.

Which part of the Bible won't you find a black man?

The Book of Job.

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

What if animals "were" injured in the making of a film. Do they list that in the credits?

Tim hurt one monkey. He is very sorry.

What do animals read in zoos?

Gnus papers.

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get if you cross a phone with a mouthwash?

Tele-Scope.

What do you get when you cross Game of Thrones with Cartoon Network?

Johnny Braavos

Greek God Jokes More Greek God Jokes

Which Greek God loved to collect animals?

Zoos

What did the Greek God say when he could finally take the world off his shoulders?

At las!

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between Brazil and Oscar Pistorious?

Oscar Pistorious has a better defence and more shots on Target

What's the difference between a musician and a dead body?

One composes, the other decomposes...

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What do you call a relationship that never works out between guitarists?

No strings attached

What did the type setter sing while he worked?

I shot the seriff, but I did not shoot the deputy!