Islamic Jokes

What does an Islamic magician say?

ALLAH KAZAM!

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How do Muslims laugh?

Muahahahamed Note: I don't have any prejudices against Islamic people.

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

What do you call a skinny, Islamic cow?

A moo-slim.

What's an Islamic extremist's favorite baseball team?

The new york Jets

What do you call someone who just occasionally dabbles in a bit of Islamic fundamentalism?

A Wahhobbyist.

What do you do to an Islamic dog that barks too much?

Musl'im

Which is an Islamic trait?

A.heading B.heading C.heading

What would you call the Islamic State if they tried to take over Antarctica?

Ice-is I'll show myself out.

What are Islamic extremists favourite drink?

Smirnoff Isis

What happens when there are two Islamic terrorist identical brothers and one is way taller than the other?

The Twin Towers.

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What do you call an Islamic pilot?

A pilot, you racist.

Where does the Islamic botanist go to pray?

In the Mossque.

What do you call a beach where you go to shoot gorillas and break Islamic law?

Haram Bay

What do they call their mistresses in Islamic countries?

Haram Baes

Who played Gandalf in the Islamic version of Lord of the Rings?

Syrian Mckellen

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

What do you call an Islamic cow?

A Mooslim

How did I clear papers of Islamic Studies?

Have faith, don't question.

What do you call an Islamic mosquito?

A 'mosque-ito'.

What does Islamic extremists and skydivers have in common?

they're both Paris shooters

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What are the three kinds of women's cancer?

1. Breast Cancer 2. Ovarian Cancer 3. Feminism

Why can't women explain feminism to men?

Because they need a man to do it for them

Door Jokes More Door Jokes

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?

He wanted to win the No Bell Prize.

Why are there no Chuck Norris knock-knock jokes?

Because Chuck only has to hit the door ONCE.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a zoo in Louisiana and a zoo anywhere else?

In Louisiana, next to the plaque with the animal's name, they've got a good recipe.

What is the difference between a refrigerator and a one foot tall man painting the side of a house?

Answer: On a quantum level, there is no difference.

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

Why aren't any atheists buying a PS4 Pro?

They don't believe in higher power.

Why was the poker game at the zoo cancelled?

Some believed that there was a cheetah among them.

Action Jokes More Action Jokes

What's the difference between feminism and Islam?

One is demonized by the actions and beliefs of a small minority. The other believes in the wage gap myth.

What do you call the action where a dead guy falls out of a car and you have to put him back in?

A rehearsal

Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

What happened to the skunk who failed his swimming lesson?

He stank to the bottom of the pool!

Why did the math student fail his exam?

He needed to sketch the sine and cuisine graphs but only knew how to do cos(-x)

Gps Jokes More Gps Jokes

What do you call your GPS if it has the voice of Terry Crews?

Crews Control.

Why don't they sell GPSs in Italy?

Because all the roads lead to Rome.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What starts with an 'M', ends with 'arriage', and recently made me the happiest man alive?

Miscarriage

What kind of monster can sit on the end of your finger?

The bogeyman.