Partner Jokes

Why are people from Arkansas so good at Science?

Because they use the Theory of Relativity to find a partner.

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How do you get your partner to give you head?

Put them in a guillotine.

What does Ronda Rousey's opponents and myself have in common?

We both barely last 14 seconds and leave our partners underwhelmed.

What do you call someone who finishes a sentence with you?

Partner in crime.

When your partner asks how many people you have ever slept with, answering 'what did I say the last time you asked?

is unwise, apparently.

How to break up with someone- You: Your ex is attractive. Partner: which one?

You: MEEEEE BYEEEEEEEE

What did George Michael say to his partner before he went to work?

Wake me up before you go-go

What do you do if your partner starts smoking?

Slow down. Use lube.

What did Sherrock Holmes say to his partner?

Sedimentary my dear Watson!

How do you know when you have a high sperm count?

Your partner has to chew before swallowing...

Which detective investigates electrical crimes?

Sherlock Ohms That's why his partner is called Wattson...

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How can you tell if your sperm count is high?

Your partner has to chew before they swallow.

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What's the worst thing about breaking up with a Japanese women?

You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets the message.

Why don't you see Santa for the rest of the year?

Because for the rest of the year he's in prison for breaking into people's houses.

Wake Jokes More Wake Jokes

What did the pumpkin say after waking up his family?

Awaken, my pump- "

Why don't bananas snore?

Because they don't want to wake up the rest of the bunch.

Whopper Jokes More Whopper Jokes

Whopper?

McDonalds responded by introducing a 3/5ths pounder.

Why did the Dairy Queen get pregnant?

The Burger King forgot to cover his whopper

Answer Jokes More Answer Jokes

Which appliance in your home do you think is the most useful?

His answer: "My mom."

How many clickbait articles does it take to change a lightbulb?

The answer may shock you.

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

How many McDonalds workers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, because they can't climb the ladder.

What's the difference between Kim Kardashian and a homeless man who works at McDonalds?

One of those greasy bums is making a lot more money.

Good Jokes More Good Jokes

Why is toilet paper no good for wrapping presents?

Cos it's tear-able.

Why did the painter from Boston have trouble making friends?

He was way too autistic for his own good.

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What is the Greek Army's motto?

Never leave your buddy's behind.

How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?

She fell out of the tree! I may not be a girl, but I'm blonde and find blonde jokes hilarious. xD

Ronda Rousey Jokes More Ronda Rousey Jokes

What do you call a girl that goes down right after you just met?

Ronda Rousey

Why does Reddit love Ronda Rousey so much?

she hits women