Pillow Jokes

Why did the pillow cross the road?

Because it was cooler on the other side.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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What does it mean when a man is in your bed, gasping for air, and calling your name?

You didn't hold down the pillow for long enough.

Who leaves money under the pillows of children with LGBT parents ?

Surely you will have guessed - the brooth fairy.

Why do Pillows work?

Cause they're white

What do they leave on your pillow at a bordello in Dijon, France?

Condom-Mints

What do you call it when... You put a pillow on a stool?

You call it a stool softener cheesiest joke I made up

Why was my other pillow jealous?

Because I like to sleep around.

How long have we had that pillow?

Wife: No idea Memory foam pillow: Two years, five months and two days

What's worse than finding a horse's head on your pillow?

A: Realising the horse is alive and well and how much did I drink last night !

What am I a pillow now?

Her: Yep, and pillows don't talk. I think we're bonding.

Why did the bed spread?

Because it saw the pillow slip.

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How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow?

A: Down in the mouth!

Why was the man so down in the mouth?

Because he ate his pillow.

What losses its head in the morning and gets it back in the evening?

A pillow

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Child Jokes More Child Jokes

Why did the children cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.

What is your sin, my child?

Me: Twitter. Padre: Wow, if I had a nickel for every time . . .

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

Why don't native Americans like snow?

We don't like anything white on our land.

How does Jesus like his hotwings?

Tinder and Mild.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why did the Mexican push his wife off a cliff?

TUH KEELLUHHH!!!

How is your job and your wife different?

I don't mind telling work the other jobs I've done

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What's the difference between an introverted physicist and an extroverted physicist?

An extroverted physicist looks at shoes when they're talking to you.

Why are you always pushing me around and talking behind my back?

I said, "well, you are in a wheelchair".

Money Jokes More Money Jokes

How do you hide money from a hippie?

Put it under the soap.

How does a mathematician ask for money?

Give me 10! dollars

France Jokes More France Jokes

What do they call the Hunger Games in France?

Battle Royale with Cheese.

Why are the streets of France lined with trees?

So the Germans can march in the shade.

Idea Jokes More Idea Jokes

How many graphic designers does it take to change a light bulb?

Does it have to be a light bulb? 'Cause I had this other idea...

Why are orphans bad at baseball?

They have no idea where home is.

Yep Jokes More Yep Jokes

What am I a pillow now?

Her: Yep, and pillows don't talk. I think we're bonding.

Why is 9 crying?

me: Because it's raining and he's getting wet wife: But we're at a water park me *takes a drink from my flask* Yep