Victim Jokes

What was a doctors diagnosis of the victims involved in a pet van crash?

Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Coma, Chameleon

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What does Bill Cosby have in common with Ninjas?

Their victims never see them coming.

What does the son of God do when he is the victim of medical malpractice?

Jesus

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

How many Tumblr women does it take to change a light bulb?

I WILL NOT BE A VICTIM!

What was the victim of the car crash wearing?

A Casualty (Casual-Tee, as in Tee-Shirt) 100% Guraneed Originality You can know for sure I made it up because of how corny it is...

What does Dracula say to his victims?

It's been nice gnawing you.

What do you call a man with a flamethrower?

2. What do you call his first victim 3. What do you call his second victim 1. Bernie 2. Crispin 3. Ash

What did the victims of a month-delayed April Fool's prank feel?

Dismay.

Who were the fastest readers of all time?

The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

Why does my van have windows?

I want to make my victims feel like they have a chance.

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What did the earthquake say to all of its victims?

Oh, sorry...my fault.

Where did he get his clothes?

That's right - a victim

Who's the victim?

Battlefield: Call of Duty

What did the cannibal say to his victim before they went for a long walk?

You're gonna be pooped after this.

What did the psychopathic dry cleaner say to his victims?

DYE, DYE , DYEEEEEEE!

How did the roman cannibal feel about his victim?

He was glad he ate her.

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Holocaust Jokes More Holocaust Jokes

What do you call the survivors of the holocaust?

Residue.

What's a holocaust?

And I reply "Oh, about eleven million"

Involve Jokes More Involve Jokes

What are the 3 rings involved in marriage?

1) The engagement ring 2) The wedding ring 3) The suffering

How is it when my son has homework,I have to be involved?

Dude,I already did my time.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Why did the cat go to the doctors?

Because it wasn't feline well

Why did the house go to the doctor?

It was having window panes.

Fail Jokes More Fail Jokes

Why did Helen Keller fail her road test?

Because she was a woman

Why did the man's kidneys fail?

They didn't study.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

How many frames per second does it take to screw in a light bulb?

30 because that's peasants work.

How long does it take for a Homeless man's stomach to be full?

A couple of seconds.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How can you tell soap operas are fictional?

In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed.

What did the fly say to the other fly?

Your man is open!"

87 Story Jokes More 87 Story Jokes

Who were the fastest readers in the world?

9/11 victims. Went through 87 stories in 10 seconds flat.

Who are the fastest readers of all time?

9/11 victims, they went through 87 stories in 15 seconds

Shower Jokes More Shower Jokes

Why did the leper return to the shower?

He forgot his head and shoulders.

What do you do to relax?

I enjoy people watching. - The most relaxing thing for me is singing in the shower. - I know.