Beer Jokes

How do you change root beer in to a beer?

Put it in a square cup

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What does an alcoholic do when he is out of beer?

Wine

What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?

A: "Have another beer."

What am I gonna do with a river?

Could you cry me a beer

What happens to a woman who falls down the stairs?

Nothing, as long as she doesn't drop my beers

Why didn't Ahmadinejad have a beer?

He wasn't in the MahMoud.

What's the difference between a beer and a down syndrome kid?

If you end up with a badly poured beer you can blow it's head off.

What's the difference between having a badly poured draft beer and having a child with Down's Syndrome?

If the head's too big on your beer, you can blow it off.

Why are bunnies so good at brewing?

Cause beer is made with hops.

What is a toad's favorite kind of beer?

One with a lot of hops.

What is the difference between wealth and poverty?

And the dad says: 'Wealth is caviar, champagne and women. Poverty is hot pocket, beer and your mother!'

Couple's Daily Question Mug

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A ham sandwhich walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says...

I'm sorry, we don't serve food here

A DHCP packet walks into a bar and asks for a beer.

Bartender says, "here, but I’ll need that back in an hour!"

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German Jokes More German Jokes

How do you guys think the Germans will do in the Olympics this year?

Not too well considering they can't finish a race.

Why was the German woman freaking out?

Because she was late.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How to not get scolded by your parents if you want GTA V?

Mom! I want to play GTA V! Giant Turtles ATTACK V!

What did the toaster say to the bread?

I want you inside me.

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight. :D

What is your least favorite force of nature?

A: Gravity. It's always bringing me down.

Beer Nut Jokes More Beer Nut Jokes

Whats the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts?

Beer nuts are $1.99 deer nuts are under a buck

What's the difference between beer nut and deer nuts?

Beer nuts will cost you about $1.25. Deer nuts are under a buck.

Terrible Jokes More Terrible Jokes

What would be a terrible name for a new beer?

Q: What would be a terrible name for a new beer A: "Mondays"...because no one would EVER want to buy a case of the Mondays...

What do Winnie the Pooh and Ivan the Terrible have in common?

The same middle name. (Shamelessly stolen from Cortana.)

Root Beer Jokes More Root Beer Jokes

How do you make a hippopotamus float?

2 hippos and a LOT of root beer.

What soft drink do pigs like best?

Root beer.

Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

Why did the photon stop drinking after traveling 670 million miles?

because Happy Hour ended.

What do you call a self help book for a Country Music singer?

Drink, Pray, Truck

Round Jokes More Round Jokes

How many cross-dressers live near Manchester?

Well, nearly 320,000 people round there have a Wigan address.

What's the difference between an 18yo and a washing machine?

You can dump your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you round for two weeks telling you it loves you