Hose Jokes

Why do the rich enjoy tending to their gardens?

Because the they have an excuse to buy hose

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What kind of girls date firefighters?

Hose.

Why are fire trucks red?

You would be too if someone was pulling on your hose all day.

Why are fire engines red?

You would be too if you were running down the road with your hose hanging out!

Why did the pimp's garden dry up and die?

Because all of his hose had kinks.

Why couldn't the fireman put out the fire?

Because his hose was in a different area code.

What did the Mexican fire chief name his two sons?

Jose and Hose "B."

Why is a fire truck always red?

Cause you'd be mad too if someone kept pulling your hose.

Why did the fire fighter call off work to spend time with his friend?

Because...bros before hose!

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons?

Hose A and Hose B

What did the Mexican fireman name his children?

Jose and Hose B

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Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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Whats the difference between a kink and a fetish?

A kink is something put in a hose, a fetish is something she wants to put in your hose.

Why are fire trucks always red?

You'd turn red if someone pulled on your hose wouldn't you?

What's the difference between a gardener and a pimp?

A gardener doesn't want his hose to have kinks.

Why is a firetruck red?

You'd be red too if you had your hose stretched that far

Why wouldn't the pimp water his lawn?

He couldn't trust his hose.

What did Carlos the fireman name his twin newborn sons?

Jose and Hose B.

What did the Mexican fire chief call his two sons?

jose and josB (Hose A &amp Hose B)

Why couldn't the Mexican be a Firefighter?

Because he didn't know the difference between Jose and Hose B.

What do you call two mexican firefighters?

Hose A and Hose B.

What do you call two Mexicans on a firetruck?

Hose A and Hose B.

Why did the fire fighter go in to save his friend first, and then fight the fire?

Because... bros before hose!!! Wubbulubbadub-dub!

What did the mexican fire chief call his 2 sons?

Hose A and hose B (read it out loud)

What did the Hispanic Fireman name his twin sons?

Jose &amp Hose-B

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What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? What starts with "P" and ends with "ORN"?

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? "FIRETRUCK"!!! What were you thinking? What starts with "P" and ends with "ORN"? ..."POPCORN"!! What were you thinking?!?!?!

What do you call two Mexicans on the back of a firetruck?

Jose and Hose B

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Why did your sister feed money to her cow ?

Because she wanted to get rich milk.

What did the doctor say to the patient who wanted to do his own surgery?

Suture self!"

Day Jokes More Day Jokes

How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood?

He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire.

How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.

Spanish Jokes More Spanish Jokes

What is the best spanish joke you've ever heard?

I couldnt find the spanish section of reddit

What did the spanish fireman name his 2 sons?

Jose and Hose B

Kind Jokes More Kind Jokes

What kind of laptop calls you a thousand times?

A dell

What kind of olives do I like?

Olive them

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What did the Spanish fireman call his two sons?

Jose and Hoseb

What did the spanish fireman name his 2 sons?

Jose and Hose B

Twin Son Jokes More Twin Son Jokes

What did the Hispanic Fireman name his twin sons?

Jose &amp Hose-B

What did the Spanish firefighter name his twin sons?

Jose and Hose B

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why is Italy's birth rate decreasing?

Because they pull out at the last second.

Why are fire trucks always red?

You'd turn red if someone pulled on your hose wouldn't you?