Vegetarian Jokes

What do you call a vegetarian with bad gas?

A leaf blower

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What does a person with no arms and a guy dating a vegetarian have in common?

They both get toe food

What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?

A salad shooter.

What's a Monk's favorite breakfast food?

Well, they're vegetarians so probably not what you're thinking...

What do Driving Testers and Vegetarians have in common?

They are both very pedantic

What did Darth Vader say to the vegetarian stormtrooper?

I find your lack of steak disturbing."

What do you call a Korean with a dog?

vegetarian. For the record, I'm Korean and have a dog haha.

What do you call an Chinese family with a pet dog?

Vegetarians. Source: I'm Chinese.

How do you know if someone is a vegetarian?

He is going to tell you.

How do you know who in the room is a vegetarian?

Don't worry, they'll tell you.

What do you call an asian walking a dog?

A vegetarian.

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What do you call a Chinese man with a pet cat?

A vegetarian.

What do call you someone who feeds on comatose patients and pizza?

A vegetarian.

What do vegetarian zombies want?

Graaaaiiiiinss!

What do you call a vegetarian?

A hopeless romaine-tic

What did the vegetarian do to get ripped?

He juiced...

How do you know when there's a vegetarian at your bbq?

They'll tell you.

What kind of joke do you tell to a vegetarian?

One they've never herbivore.

How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf?

He became a vegetarian.

What's the secret to a long life?

I said, "Never order vegetarian in Texas"

What do Native Americans call vegetarians?

Poor hunters

What was the cannibal's favorite part about the Vegetarian dish?

The Vegetarian

How can you tell if a person is a vegetarian?

Don't worry. They'll tell you they're a vegetarian.

Who are the hamburgers favourite people?

Vegetarians!

What do vegetarian zombies eat?

Grrrrrainnnnnssss.

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Chinese Family Jokes More Chinese Family Jokes

What do you call an Chinese family with a pet dog?

Vegetarians. Source: I'm Chinese.

How does a Chinese family name their children?

They throw 3-9 pots and pans down a flight of stairs.

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What does a black and white bear use to cook it's dinner?

A pan, duh!

What did the cannibal's wife give her husband when he came home late for dinner?

A. The cold shoulder.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

Why does the prosecutor only choose jurors who drive Hummers?

So that there's no chance of a hung jury

How do you get two whales in a car?

Start in England and drive West.

Darth Vader Jokes More Darth Vader Jokes

Whats the best thing on the menu?

Waiter: The cheesebur- Me: WRONG! *points to the picture I drew on it of Ironman fighting Darth Vader*

Why was Darth Vader so upset?

He was looking for the Rebels in Aldeerwrong places...

Mathematician Jokes More Mathematician Jokes

How many mathematicians does it take to screw in zero lightbulbs?

Indeterminate

What does a mathematician do when they have constipation....?

They work it out with a pencil!

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you call a dog with short legs and steel balls?

Sparky

Why did the dog go to the hospital?

He was feeling ruff.

Bruce Lee Jokes More Bruce Lee Jokes

What was Bruce Lee's favorite drink?

Waattaaah!

What was Bruce Lee's favorite hotel?

HYATT!!!

Person Jokes More Person Jokes

What do you call a person with ten dollars?

A college student.

What is skeleton?

Interviewer:what is skeleton? Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!