G Jokes

How is your day going?

G- Pretty well, Do you want me to walk you back? B- walk me back? G- to the friendzone you just tried to escape.

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Why didn't Sug Knight talk to the police?

Because the g is silent

How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the G.

What do you call a gangster who is really in touch with his emotions?

An emo-g

What's the capital of Greece?

The G

Why do astronauts bring their phone into space?

Because they can get 4g

How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.

What's a Christian's favourite chord progression?

G,Esus.

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

What did 50 cent's grandma say to him when he gave her a hand woven scarf for mother's day?

G u knit

What ten letter word starts with g-a-s?

Automobile.

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What has an N, an I, two G's, an E, and an R and can be used to describe people of a certain color?

GINGER.

How do you make one girl disappear?

just add a G and now she's gone.

How'd you find out?

G:"I'm on both."

Why did the skeletons start dancing?

Because they forgot the g in graveyard.

What does a Sparkle magazine model call her g-spot?

Her glitterus

This joke may have profanity.

Why did H blow itself up?

Because G had.

Why the letter "G" is scary?

In one fine evening it can turn your host into . . . GHOST.

Why isn't the word gangster pronounced Jang-ster?

Because there ain't no such thing as a soft 'G.'

What is dark, invades you in your sleep, and starts with N-I-G?

Nightmares you racist.

How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.

How do you make the number one disappear?

Add the letter G and it’s “gone”!

You might also enjoy:

Friendzone Jokes More Friendzone Jokes

What do you say when you friendzone a brony?

Friendship is magic.

How many friendzoned guys does it take to change a light bulb?

None, they'll just keep complimenting it and get mad when it doesn't want to screw.

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

How do you spell a hated opponent with three letters?

NME (enemy).

How do you spell elephant ?

E-l-l-e-e-f-a-n-t "That's not how the dictionary spells it" "You didn't ask me how the dictionary spelt it !"

Christian Jokes More Christian Jokes

What do you call an Atheist at a Christian fancy dress party?

A cross-dresser.

Why could Neo from the Matrix never be a Christian?

Because he has his own Hole-y Trinity -I'll see myself out

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why do men like love at first site?

A. It saves them a lot of time.

What do you give to a man that had everything?

Antibiotics

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do my iPhone and my girlfriend have in common?

They both go off again two minutes later to remind me of the same thing.

Why do babies love sticking things in their mouth?

And why doesn't my girlfriend share this impulse?

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the vampire go crazy at Burger King?

He saw all that catsup and wanted a transfusion.

What's a reporter's favorite food?

Ice cream because they always want a scoop!

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

What do you call it when someone gets hit by a bus on his way to pay off his student loans?

Crippling debt! It's funny because he can't walk anymore!

What's worse than a white guy walking into a church andshooting 9 black people?

He let the others get away... I feel I'll be downvoted to hell for this...

Emo Jokes More Emo Jokes

What falls down faster from a tree, a leaf or an emo?

A leaf. The rope catches the emo.

How do you get an emo out of a tree?

Untie the rope...