Liquor Jokes

How are women like casinos?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What does a good bar and a good woman have in common?

Liquor in the front poker in the back.

What do a woman and a bar have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

When drinking liquor while watching baseball, at what point will you be the most drunk?

Bottom of the fifth, of course.

How do French girls hold their liquor?

By the ears

How do you make any woman wet?

Liquor

How does a French lady hold her liquor?

By the ears

Why do Russians have so many bear fighting stories?

Because their liquor is strong and their women are hairy.

What do you call an Irishman who can't hold his liquor?

OC A quadriplegic.

How does a French woman hold her liquor?

By the ears.

How much liquor does it take before you start telling racist jokes?

For me, it's about three fifths.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Where's a lesbian's favorite place to shop?

The Liquor store

How do Jazz musicians drink their liquor?

Straight, No Chaser.

What do a good bar and a woman have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

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What do you usually find with four Catholics?

A fifth.

What is CC Sabathia's favorite inning to pitch in baseball?

The bottom of the fifth

Stumble Jokes More Stumble Jokes

How much does 1 drop of gas cost me?

The boy stumbles: "Well euhm ... nothing I guess." "Thanks, I'll have 2 million drops then"

What do you do when you see your wife stumbling around in the backyard?

Shoot her again.

Baptist Jokes More Baptist Jokes

Why don't Baptist preachers color their hair?

They just pray the gray away

What's the difference between Baptists and Methodists?

Methodists will make eye contact at the liquor store.

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

What would Bill Cosby's name be if he was Russian?

Vladimir Puddin'

What does a code-switching trilingual Russian say when he wants to increase his bovine supply?

Mas cow.

Store Jokes More Store Jokes

What I say: "Does anyone need anything from the store?

What I mean: "I'm off to smoke a bowl in my car so I can deal with all of you."

Where do bears store their military weapons?

In bearracks.

Good Bar Jokes More Good Bar Jokes

What does a good bar and a good woman have in common?

Liquor in the front poker in the back.

What do a good bar and a woman have in common?

Liquor in the front, poker in the back.

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How can you tell if a turkey is from Germany?

By the way it Goebbels

What's the difference between a dead bagpiper in the road and a dead country singer in the road?

A. The country singer may have been on the way to a recording session.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

How do Vampires buy pants if they can't look in a mirror?

Now, I tweet them

Why did i buy a black phone?

So it would run faster!!