Lake Jokes

Why are boats being driven into the side of the lake?

It's ram a dam

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Why did the hipster drown in the lake?

Because he went ice skating before it was cool.

What is the difference between Coors Light and a lake?

The can

What do you get when you cross a lake with a deflating raft?

Halfway.

What do you call the Moon spirit that at once sits upon a lake of glowing jade and exists nestled within our divine souls?

Altha'or syzygena

How was your day?

Lifeguard 2: Sad, I saw a bear in lake 1: How is that sad 2: He could bearly swim! 1:.. 2: He ate 3 campers

Where do you take a Chihuahua that has fallen into a lake?

To a weterinarian!

What did a police officer write in the criminal report, when they found a homey from the bottom of a lake, wrapped in 200 kg's of metal chains?

Offender stole more than he could carry by swimming

Why were the ghosts wet and tired?

They had just dread-ged the lake.

Why did the elephant jump in the lake when it began to rain ?

To stop getting wet !

What's big and grey and lives in a lake in Scotland ?

The Loch Ness Elephant !

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in a lake?

Bob

Why couldn't the lake birds get along?

Because they were SWAN enemies.

Why did the sheep jump into the lake?

A: He wanted to take a ba-a-a-th.

What do you get when you cross the Italian mafia with the Russian mafia?

Thrown in a lake.

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Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

What do you get when you cross a Jedi with a nun?

a force of habit

What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp ?

A bear faced lyre !

New York Jokes More New York Jokes

Why did New York get all the lawyers, and New Jersey all the toxic waste sites?

New Jersey picked first.

What do you call a wine convention in upstate New York?

The Lake Champlain Champagne Campaign

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why did the pregnant woman love to tell jokes?

Because she had a pun in the oven!

What do you get when you cross a pig with an elephant?

A very large animal that knows a lot of jokes.

Ram Jokes More Ram Jokes

What did the IT guy say when he threw RAM sticks at the stripper?

RAMs a make a dance!"

What's the difference between 2015 and Moore's Law?

One's the year of the ram, the other is the ram of the year.

Dam Jokes More Dam Jokes

What does a fish say when it hits a brick wall?

DAM!!!

How much wood does a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck chuck could chuck wood?

None because only beavers give a dam.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies?

I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage I do realize this is a sick joke but it still makes me laugh when I hear it. I'm a horrible person

What's the difference between /r/jokes and your mom?

Your mom is funny.

Moon Jokes More Moon Jokes

What do you call a Cow on the moon?

A Moo - nwalker

How do you know when the Moon is going broke?

When it's down to it's last quarter.

Sequel Jokes More Sequel Jokes

What will the sequel to Lake Placid that takes place 50 years later be called?

Lake Flaccid

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream?

She got hit by a bus. Sequel: Why did the little girl's sister drop her ice cream Someone threw a fridge at her.