Waitress Jokes

What did the waitress say to the customer after she forgot his Miso soup?

A: uh, me so sorry.

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When can you tell your waitress is having a bad day?

When she has a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pencil.

Where do one-legged waitresses work?

IHOP. Tipping your waitress takes on a whole new meaning.

What's the difference between a waitress and your mom?

A waitress leaves me alone after I give her the tip.

Why was the United Nations concerned when the waitress dropped the platter on Thanksgiving?

It meant the fall of Turkey, the ruin of Greece, and the breakup of China.

Why do waitresses hate mohels?

Because they never leave a tip.

What's the worst part of giving a magician a ride home?

When you get there, you turn into the driveway. Ba-dum-bum! Don't forget to tip your waitress!

What do you get when you drop a piano in a coal mine?

A flat minor. Night... Don't forget to tip your waitress

When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

How do you know your waitress is having a rough night?

She's got a tampon behind her ear and she can't find her pen.

What did the redditor do at the restaurant when he was done with his meal?

Tips waitress*

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Why do waitresses love serving men in fedoras?

If you're nice to them, their tipping intensifies.

How much is a soft drink ?

Waitress: Fifty cents. Girl: How much is refill Waitress: The first is free. Girl: Well then I'll have a refill.

How would you like that cooked?

gets right up in waitresses face* With frickin fire, obviously

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.

What did Johnny Cash say to the waitress after he got sick at a Mexican restaurant?

I've bean everywhere, ma'am!

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Tip Jokes More Tip Jokes

How do Rabbis make money?

They keep the tips.

What kind of car did the German cowboy purchase?

Audi *tips hat*

Customer Jokes More Customer Jokes

How did you find your steak sir?

Customer: Oh I just moved the potatoes and there it was!

Why did the banker resign?

His customers lost interest in him.

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's the disease that slowly turns your skin black?

Rap Music

When is a school paper not a school paper?

When it's turned into the teacher.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What's the difference between an airplane bathroom and your mom?

Your mom can fit 3 people inside her comfortably!

Why is everything lying on the floor?

my mom asked Gravity, I replied.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you do when your one night stand doesn't take Plan B?

Plan C-ya.

Why did the dog sleep so poorly?

By mistake he plugged his electric blanket into the toaster and kept popping out of bed all night!

Miso Jokes More Miso Jokes

What did the waitress say to the customer after she forgot his Miso soup?

A: uh, me so sorry.

What the japanese version of mission impossible?

Miso impossible

Legge Jokes More Legge Jokes

Where do one-legged waitresses work?

IHOP. Tipping your waitress takes on a whole new meaning.

What kind of coffee does a peg legged pirate drink?

Decalfinated.

Driveway Jokes More Driveway Jokes

What's the difference between my daughter and my driveway?

I don't want to plow my driveway

How many black people does it to pave a driveway?

One. You just have to spread him real thin.