Gold Medal Jokes

Whats better then getting a gold medal in the Paralympics?

Walking.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being

Whats better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded.

How would America win gold medals in shooting for the Olympics?

They take their prison population and school population to Rio.

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded

What's better than winning a gold medal in the quadriplegic (crippled) Olympics?

Walking.

What's the only thing better than a gold medal at the Paralympics?

Legs

What is better than getting a gold medal at the paralympics?

Having legs.

Why does Mexico never get gold medals in olympics?

Because all their swimmers, runners, and high jumpers are in USA.

What is better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics?

Having two legs

What's better than a gold medal at the Paralympics?

Working legs.

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What happens when a blonde wins a gold medal at the Olympics?

She has it bronzed.

Why has the pope never won a gold medal?

Because he always came in a little behind.

What did Ryan Lochte name his Gold medal?

GoldiLochtes

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Paralympic Jokes More Paralympic Jokes

What's better than winning a silver in the paralympics?

Being able to walk.

What's better than a gold medal at the Paralympics?

Working legs.

Rio Jokes More Rio Jokes

How bad was the Rio 2016 Olympic?

None of the North Korean athletes defected.

Who poisoned the waters in the 2016 Olympics?

It was I, **RIO**!!!

Runner Jokes More Runner Jokes

Why does Mexico never get gold medals in olympics?

Because all their swimmers, runners, and high jumpers are in USA.

Why are most runners single?

At best they're ASICS.

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What did the farmer say when he tried to milk the cow, but nothing came out?

Time to try the udder one."

When you're away on a business trip, do you think about me?

Apparently "Only to stop myself from coming too quickly" wasn't the right answer.

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

How do blondes carpool?

They meet up a work

Who does the butcher look forward to seeing after a tough day at work?

His loving knife.

Usa Jokes More Usa Jokes

What do you call a bee that was born in the USA?

USB

What do you call a deer without eyes?

No-eye deer! Note: we are from Hicksville, USA. This may not make sense without the Midwestern accent.

America Jokes More America Jokes

Who gets saved?

America

Why does Martin Luther King like jam?

Because God bless America

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded

What do you call a Russian wearing a head scarf, a balaclava and a helmet?

Anything you want. He can't hear a thing.