Lemon Jokes

Where do lemons go to jail?

Lemonworth

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What do you call a lemon staring at an elderly lady?

Citric Flaccid

What do you call a Jamaican redditor?

Lemon

What do quantum physicists do when life gives them lemons?

Everything

What does a walrus and Tupperware have in common?

What does a walrus and Tupperware have in common? .. They both like a tight seal *What looks like a lemon and shaped like a rock? .. A lemon shaped rock *What is brown and sticky? ..A brown stick

Why did the lemon go sour?

Because it had Lemon-Aids

What did a lemon with a lisp say to the juicer?

Thtop taking the pith out of me!

How are synagogues like lemons?

They're full of acidic juice.

How do you help a lemon?

Lemon-aid.

What do you get when you cross a Triceratops and a lemon?

A. A Dino-sour 2.Q. Were do robots go to worship A. Mech-a

Why do emo's always act so sour?

Because you can't spell Lemon without emo.

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What do you call it when a lemon jerks off her own brother until he chafes?

Inzest

How did Sherlock reply to Watson's inquiry, "Sherlock, where did you get all of these lemons?

A lemon tree, my dear Watson."

Where did you get so many lemons?

Holmes replies, "A lemon tree, Watson.."

Whoa that's a lemon, how much did you pay?

Only $3,200" Dude it's literally a piece of fruit "Damn....not again"

Why does the lemon feel uncomfortable making friends outside of tumblr?

Because it has cis-trust issues

Why did the lemon turn green?

Because he had lime disease

What's your favorite preservative salt, vinegar, lemon?

Mine's embalming fluid.

What did the dyslexic man do when life gave him lemons?

He made melon-ade

Why are crocodiles brown and flat?

A: Because if they were yellow and round, they'd be lemons.

What do you give to a lemon in need?

Lemonaid.

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Robot Jokes More Robot Jokes

Why don't robots have any brothers anymore?

Because they have trans-sisters.

Why did the robot cross the road?

Because it was carbon bonded to the chicken.

Lisp Jokes More Lisp Jokes

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

What do you call a traitor with a lisp?

Judith

Lemon Tree Jokes More Lemon Tree Jokes

What are you planting?

said Watson. "It's a lemon tree, my dear Watson."

How did Sherlock reply to Watson's inquiry, "Sherlock, where did you get all of these lemons?

A lemon tree, my dear Watson."

Jamaican Jokes More Jamaican Jokes

What did the Jamaican Priest say to the Baker's rolls?

You a cinnamon.

What did the Jamaican say was his favourite country?

yea-mon

A. Jokes More A. Jokes

Why aren't there any nails in a lesbian's floor?

A. They're all laid with tongue and groove.

What does CHAOS stand for?

A. The Chiefs Have Arrived On Scene.

Watson Jokes More Watson Jokes

What's a ten-letter word meaning 'supplying nourishment'?

Sherlock replied, "Alimentary, my dear Watson."

How would you like your school girls today, Mr. Holmes?

Elementary, my dear Watson.

Elderly Lady Jokes More Elderly Lady Jokes

What do you call a lemon staring at an elderly lady?

Citric Flaccid

How do you get an elderly lady to say f***?

Get another one to say bingo

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What would happen if the BLM people became white lives matter?

They would finally be right.

What happened at the cannibal's wedding party?

They toasted the bride and groom.