Propose Jokes

What did the string say when the rope proposed marriage?

Let's knot."

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How does a nihilist propose to his fiancee?

Even though my existence is meaningless I want to spend the rest of it with you."

How did the stoner propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage, you wanna?

How did the pothead propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage.. you wanna?"

What did the melon say to the banana when it proposed?

Yes! But we cantaloupe.

What did Shakespeare say when Mr. Big proposed to him?

Noth"

What did Patrick Stewart say when he proposed to his wife?

Engage.

How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.

What did the melon tell her boyfriend when he proposed?

Yes but we cantaloupe.

How do you propose to a stoner?

Marriage, you wanna

How did the rice crispy propose to the cornflake?

It Snapped, Crackled and Popped the question.

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Which his guide had proposed to climb. - Do people tumble down often here?

No, the guide said, one time is usually enough.

Why don't women propose to men?

Because the guy'd always be disappointed when she took out a ring.

How does a hamster propose to his girlfriend?

With a hamst-ring! I'm sorry.

When a coworker tells everyone he proposed, I'm the guy that asks, "So, what did she say?

I'm funny that way.

How did a Hispanic farmer propose to his girlfriend?

With arroz.

How did the phone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.

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Rest Jokes More Rest Jokes

Where does Frankenstein's automobile go to rest..?

Boris' Karl loft.

Why are Saturday and Sunday so strong?

Because the rest are weekdays.

Cornflake Jokes More Cornflake Jokes

How did the rice crispy propose to the cornflake?

It Snapped, Crackled and Popped the question.

Why did Rudolfo salute the box of Cornflakes in the supermarket?

Because the label said General Foods.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What did the Pilipino orphan boy say to the linguist who wanted to adopt him?

I'll tagalog!

What do condoms and taxes have in common?

Republicans are against them and democrats want more for schools.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What did the man say after his wife was dragged off the beach by a seal?

Welp, seal ate her.

Why did Kanye blow up the bakery?

Because no one man should have all that flour.

Separate Jokes More Separate Jokes

How do you separate the men from the boys in the Navy?

With a crowbar.

Why do galaxies put on boring shows while separated?

Because their performance is lack-cluster.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What did Batman tell Robin before Robin got in the car?

Hey Robin get in the car"!

How can you tell a bernie sanders supporter from a hillary supporter?

There age

Rope Jokes More Rope Jokes

Why did the rope go to jail?

Because he was knotty

How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.

Engage Jokes More Engage Jokes

How can people get engaged after dating less than a year?

You haven't seen their fall wardrobe yet and tbh it could be a deal breaker

What did Jay-Z call Beyonce after they got engaged?

Fiancee.