Watermelon Jokes

What did the watermelon say to the honeydew?

I'm sorry baby, we just cantaloupe."

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Why couldn't the watermelon get married in Vegas?

Because his fiancee is a cantaloupe!

What's the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon?

Well the first noticeable difference is that the watermelon tastes better.

What is the difference between 400 dead babies and a watermelon?

I don't have a watermelon in my garage.

Why do watermelons have water in Them?

Because they are planted in the spring!

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby?

One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one is a watermelon.

What do you call a melon that's had a bit too much to drink?

A Watermelon...

Why won't the honeydew marry the watermelon?

Because they cantaloupe..

Whats the difference between a watermelon and a baby?

One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer and the other one is a watermelon

Whats the difference between a watermelon and baby?

One's really fun to smash with a sledge-hammer and the other is just a watermelon

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How does Homer Simpson say watermelon in French?

Melon D'OH

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

What do you call a watermelon in California?

A melon

How do you get the water in a watermelon?

Plant it in the spring.

Why can't watermelons get married?

Because they cantaloupe!

What will you do with a million watermelons?

I don't want the watermelons, I just want the money."

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Why doesn't the melon get married?

Because it cantaloupe.

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They look at your feet instead of theirs.

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By selling your camera.

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Neither! Everyone knows they prefer hot pockets

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What is a prime way of knowing when a retard is thirsty?

He'll have water on the brain.

What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"