Elope Jokes

Which fruit can't get married?

A can't elope. Or better yet None of them because of the lgbt movement.

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Why have no melons ever gotten married in Vegas?

Because they can't elope!

What do you call a cantaloupe who can't elope?

A cantaloupe. The spelling is completely different...

Why was the farmer disappointed when he tried to marry his prized melon?

Because the minister wouldn't marry the two, since a melon can't elope!

Why couldn't the melon couple run off and get married?

Because they can't elope.

Why do melons always have big weddings?

Because they can't elope.

Why do melons have traditional weddings?

Because they can't elope!

Why couldn't the melons get married?

Because they can't elope.

Why were the boy and girl melons depressed?

Because they can't elope.

Why did the melon leave her boyfriend?

He said he can't elope.

Why did the melon break up with her melon boyfriend?

He told her he *can't elope*.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

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Why can't deer get marred?

Because they can't elope

Why didn't the melon get married?

Because it can't elope.

Why couldn't the melons secretly get married?

Because they were cant elopes

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How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.

What do you call a sheep taking Ambien?

Shleepy!

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Why did the chick disappoint his mother?

Because he wasn't all he was *cracked up* to be.

Why was Leia disappointed on her wedding night?

Han shot first.

Well Jokes More Well Jokes

What is a better name for cows?

Lawn mooers! My 12 year old sister made this up... She out dad joked me..and I'm a dad!

What do you call an Eastern European cashier?

A Checkoutslovakian. (Better said than read)

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

What is the worst way to spell Mississippi?

Correctly.

What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A Tyrannosaurus Wrecks. EDIT: Spelled "Tyrannosaurus" incorrectly.

Prize Jokes More Prize Jokes

What prize did the dead body receive?

Atrophy

Why was the farmer disappointed when he tried to marry his prized melon?

Because the minister wouldn't marry the two, since a melon can't elope!

Marry Jokes More Marry Jokes

How long you two been married?

It's been thirt- (wife shaking head) teenish twenty- (still shaking) for a long time.

Why couldn't the melons secretly get married?

Because they were cant elopes

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did Helen Keller fire her maid?

Cuz she left the plunger in the toilet. - Jackie Martling

What do sound engineers say when they leave?

Audios

Ant Jokes More Ant Jokes

How many ants does it takes to fill an apartment?

Ten-ants

Why aren't ants going to church?

Because they are in sects.