Log Jokes

What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet?

The Captains log

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What will you find in the toilet of a ship?

The captains log.

What's in the toilet of the Star Ship enterprise?

The captains log

How do trees access the internet?

They log on

What is something you can use to find the pH of tree sap?

A log!

How do you know you're not logged into reddit?

There are posts on the frontpage

Why are lumberjacks bad at online video games?

Because their connections are so weak they are always logging out.

How long have you been chopping wood for?

I'm not sure, I'll check the logs"

Why couldn't the lumberjack sign into Facebook?

Because he was logged out!

How does Santa Claus remember which chimneys he's been down?

He keeps a log

What does Imperator Furiosa like to click when she logs into a website?

REMEMBER ME!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you mean I can't change the past?

logs on to Wikipedia*

What do children think of the world?

I don't know, this is the first time I've logged onto Reddit, today.

Why do beavers spend a fortune on the Internet?

They never want to log off.

How did the tree get on to Reddit?

It just logged on...

What is it called when a hacker poops?

Logging out

Why did the girl put her bed in the fireplace?

Because she wanted to sleep like a log.

Why is DeadMau5 bad at math?

He drops the base when doing logs.

How does a tree access the internet?

It logs on.

What did the sausage say when it couldn't log on to the Internet?

If at first you don't succeed Fry Fry again

How do the trees get on the internet?

They log on.

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Forest Jokes More Forest Jokes

When two bears asked a pastor to marry them in the forest, what did he say?

Hold on, let me get my bear rings."

What does a mathematicion find in a forest?

A natural log.

Poop Jokes More Poop Jokes

When a seeing eye dog poops, who cleans it up?

This is the kind of stuff that makes my head hurt.

Why do bears poop in the woods?

So nobody will see their bare (bear) bottom!

Spock Jokes More Spock Jokes

What does Spock sing in the shower?

What does Spock sing in the shower? I'll stop the world and meld with you!

Why did Spock dump his wife?

because William Shatner I know it's old, but I love it so

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

What happens when you smoke pot in Saudi Arabia?

You get stoned.

What do graphic designers smoke up to get high?

Adobe.

Drown Mathematician Jokes More Drown Mathematician Jokes

What sound is emitted by a drowning mathematician?

log log log log log log log log log...

What did the drowning mathematician say?

Logloglogloglog...

Internet Jokes More Internet Jokes

How do You find the worst joke of the internet?

You reddit.

Why was the skeleton using the Internet?

To bone up on his schoolwork.

Euler Jokes More Euler Jokes

What did Euler find in his toilet?

A natural log

What's a mathematicians worst nightmare?

An EULer spill

Boil Jokes More Boil Jokes

Why was Easter the aardvark's favorite holiday?

Because he liked aard-boiled eggs!

What are you having?

First cannibal: Hard-boiled legs.