Chinese Man Jokes

What's the difference between a Chinese man and a lobster under a bus?

Nothing. They're both crustacians.

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How Long is a Chinese man?

Its his name.

How do you blind a Chinese man?

lay floss over their eyes

What Does A Chinese Man Need When Taking his Dog Out?

Oven mitts.

How does a Chinese man start a religious video?

Press pray.

What do you call a Chinese man allergic to dogs?

Starving.

Why did the Chinese man tell a joke?

Just China be funny.

Why did a chinese man ride a bike to the brothel?

To get laid.

What did the Chinese man give his daughter?

A clothes hanger.

Which one is the odd one out; a Crab, a Tuna, a Chinese man run over by a bus or a Lobster?

A tuna, because the rest of them are crustaceans.

What do you call a Chinese man with a pet cat?

A vegetarian.

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What do you call a Chinese man with one foot?

Taiwon Shou.

When did the Chinese man know it was time to go to the dentist?

Tooth hurty

What did the Chinese man say when Winter came around?

Reddit snow, reddit snow, reddit snow!

What do you call a Chinese man with a video camera?

Phil Ming

What doesn't belong in this group, A lobster, an octopus, a crab, or a chinese man under a bus?

The octopus, obviously, the three others are crustaceans.

How do you make a Chinese man no longer Asian?

Just spin him around in circles until he's disoriented

What do you call a Chinese man with one leg shorter than the other?

Li Ning

How many Chinese men does it take to make a Smartphone?

I dunno, ask the Kids.

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs?

He was shot in the face.

How do you know if a Chinese man has robbed your house?

Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and two hours later, he's still trying to back out of your driveway.

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad internet connection?

Hi Ping

What do you call a Chinese man with a bad sense of direction?

Wong Wei

What did the Chinese man say when he found out his mother died?

I can't bereave it!

What did the Chinese man say when ophthalmologist told him he had a cataract?

No, I have a Rincoln Continental!*

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Bus Jokes More Bus Jokes

What do you call 50 feminists on a bus?

Trick Question. You can't fit 50 feminists on a bus.

What do you call the white guy on a bus full of black guys?

Coach.

Floss Jokes More Floss Jokes

What does AF mean?

After Flossing. Now go brush your teeth and they will be clean AF. Why do you ask 10: Mom said you were lazy AF.

When was the last time you flossed?

Me: "BRO, you were there."

Starve Jokes More Starve Jokes

What do Ethiopians do at night?

Starve.

Why would you never starve in the desert?

Because of all the sandwiches there.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between the space shuttle and a 2.5 kiloton bomb?

The crew.

What's the difference between a cow and the crucifixion?

You can't milk a cow for 2000 years

Lay Jokes More Lay Jokes

What do you get when... ...you cross a religious skeptic, a dyslexic, and an insomniac?

A person who lays awake at night wondering if there really is a dog.

What's the difference between a Redditor and an egg?

Eggs get laid only once

Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

How did the farmer find his daughter?

He Tractor.

What does a rock do all day?

Nothing. (this joke was made by daughter when she was 5)

Vegetarian Jokes More Vegetarian Jokes

What do you call a vegetarian with diarrhea?

A salad shooter.

What do vegetarian zombies eat?

Grrrrrainnnnnssss.

Vietnamese Jokes More Vietnamese Jokes

Where are you when you're in the U.K. waiting for Vietnamese soup?

Pho queue

What did the Vietnamese architect say to the Chinese post man?

What did the Vietnamese architect say to the Chinese post man? CHING CHONG