Electron Jokes

Which element is most likely to surrender an electron?

Francium.

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What's a homotron?

Just an electron that goes around looking for a fuse to blow!

How do you turn a seal into a sea lion?

Remove an electron.

How many electrons does a negatively charged oxygen atom have?

Nion

How do you make a Sea Lion?

You remove an electron from a Seal!

What's the difference between a seal and a sealion?

An electron

Why did the electron go to jail?

He was charged with battery!

What is the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

an electron

Why was the electron mad?

Well, it doesn't really matter...

What did the nucleus say to get the electron up?

Up and atom!

What did one atom say to the other?

I lost an electron..." The other atom asks "Are you sure " First atom replies, "I'm positive!"

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What did Ronald Reagan say in his presidential campaign?

Electron. Also, what did the Greek warrior say when he saw the wooden horse Hydrogen please spare me

What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

What does electron and proton say when they go to war?

Chaaaarge!!

What does the electron say to the resistor?

Ohm my god you're impeding me. *initiate knee slap

Why didn't the electron leave it's house?

Because it was grounded.

What's the difference between a seal and sea lion?

One electron

What did the atom say when it lost an electron?

I better keep an ion that.

Never take advice from electrons.

They are always negative.

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Surrender Jokes More Surrender Jokes

What do the French learn in basic training?

How to surrender in twenty-seven different languages.

Why do we need France on our side against Saddam and Osama?

A. So the French can show them how to surrender.

Fuel Jokes More Fuel Jokes

What does the train use to fuel it's gaming addiction?

Steam. I'm so sorry.

What does RoboCop use for fuel?

Petroleum

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call a tree that lost its family in a forrest fire?

Mourning wood

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

Wine Jokes More Wine Jokes

What's it called when you make sure you don't spill the wine?

Being carafe-ful.

How much wine can a cat drink?

2. How do you resuscitate a drunk cat 3. Will they do an autopsy on a dead cat

Hang Jokes More Hang Jokes

Why does the KKK like christmas?

Because it's the one day that they have an excuse to hang coloured balls from trees.

What does a suicidal person say while leaving a party?

I want to hang by myself for a bit. Edit: Not suicidal. Just gallows humor.

Breakfast Jokes More Breakfast Jokes

How is your diet going?

Horrible. I had eggs for breakfast." "Scrambled " "Cadbury."

Where do tired linedancers go for Breakfast?

A. Ihop

Sea Lion Jokes More Sea Lion Jokes

How do seals keep their coats so smooth?

They use a sea lion.

What is the difference between a seal and a sea lion?

an electron

Presidential Campaign Jokes More Presidential Campaign Jokes

What Did Chris Christie Give Up For Lent?

The US Presidential Campaign!

What did Ronald Reagan say in his presidential campaign?

Electron. Also, what did the Greek warrior say when he saw the wooden horse Hydrogen please spare me