Attract Jokes

Why are TV's attracted to people?

Because we turn them on. / /

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

How can you attract a group of like minded friends?

This clique bait will shock you!

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

Why was the monkey attracted to the paint?

Cuz it was yellow and appealing! Sorry if this is bad. Seen too many of the same jokes here and I wanted to add an original joke.

What do Canadian women put behind their ears to attract men?

Their ankles!

Why was Betty Boop never attracted to Mickey Mouse?

She's only attracted to colored guys.

Why do people buy smart cars?

Because opposites attract.

Why do people love their smartphones so much?

Because opposites attract. (Told to me by 2 students today, loved it!)

What's the best way to attract a pervert?

The NSFW tag, you freak

This joke may have profanity.

Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country?

Because opposite poles attract

Why were the Persians attracted to the Anatolian Greeks?

Because they were Ionic.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

What did the one electron say to the other when it asked it out on a date?

Get outta here, I'm not attracted to you!

Why do men like smart women?

A. Opposites attract.

What attracted you to our company?

Well, I heard you pay money in exchange for work

Where's my Spiderman costume?

I want to wear it to the science museum "In your closet, why " 9: DUH. To attract radioactive spiders!

Why were all the ladies attracted to Jesus?

Because he was hung like this. (Hold your arms out wide)

Why are all the ladies attracted to Voldemort?

Because of his hex appeal.

Why do all black people go to heaven?

The Son is attracted to black

How did the Royal Navy attract so many recruits?

They were impressive!

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Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why should you be sure to pay your exorcist on time?

You wouldn't want to get repossessed!

Why isn't there a college in the world of Harry Potter?

Because even Magic can't pay your college Loan

Original Joke Jokes More Original Joke Jokes

What gets you a downvote?

Reposting an old joke that wasn't funny the first time. What gets you an upvote? Posting an original joke, or a funny joke I've heard before. What get's you 5 upvotes? Being

Why was the monkey attracted to the paint?

Cuz it was yellow and appealing! Sorry if this is bad. Seen too many of the same jokes here and I wanted to add an original joke.

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

Why did the belt get locked up?

A: He held up a pair of pants.

What makes an ideal present for a monster?

Five pairs of gloves one for each hand.

Saudi Arabia Jokes More Saudi Arabia Jokes

Why does Saudi Arabia have so much oil?

Because the women are not allowed to drive.

What's the difference between America and Saudi Arabia?

You don't need a computer to play minesweeper in Saudi Arabia. (I'm not sorry)

Cashier Jokes More Cashier Jokes

How much for the best friend?

Manager : Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.

Why didn't the cashier laugh at my joke?

It didn't make cents

Haram Bae Jokes More Haram Bae Jokes

What do you call an attractive primate corpse in Saudi Arabia?

Haram bae

What do the neighbor's wife and a dead gorilla have in common?

They're both haram bae.

Mummy Jokes More Mummy Jokes

What do you call a mummy on a horse?

A knight in Charmin armor.

Why were ancient Egyptian children confused?

Because their daddies were mummies.

Paint Jokes More Paint Jokes

How to you get rid of the dandelions on your lawn?

Paint one of them black the others will move away.

Why are your nails painted two different colors?

Daughter: Dad. It's an accent color. Dad: ... Dad: Can I hear it