Planet Jokes

How do you organize a space party?

You planet.

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Why are asteroids so strong when they hit the planet?

Because they take a steroid.

How do your organize a space party?

You planet! (It won't turn out well though because it has no atmosphere.)

What planet smells the worst?

Poopiter. This joke courtesy of my 7 year old son. He was very proud of it.

How do we confirm life on another planet?

If you find a rare Pepe drawn the disk.

How does our solar system organize a party?

They Planet

How does NASA organise a party?

They Planet.

How many Duggars does it take to screw a planet?

EOM

What type of jokes do planets tell each other?

Cosmic jokes.

What is the coolest food on the planet?

Burr-ito!

How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?

Planet

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What's it called when a planet orbits its sun 8 times?

An orbyte

How do you make sure you have the best space party for your kid?

You planet early.

How do astronomers plan a party?

they planet.

What vehicle does T-Rex use to go from planet to planet?

A: A Dinosaucer

Why is it so hard to throw a party in space?

Because you have to planet.

What did earth say to the other planet?

You guys have no life!"

What's the most cleanest animal on the planet?

A Hygiena.

What did earth say to the other planets?

You guys have no life!

Why is milk the fastest liquid on the planet?

It's pasteurised before you can see it!

What does earth say to the other planets?

You have no life

When he grow up, he will ask me, "Dad, did you name me after a planet?

And i will be like, "No:("

Where is everybody?

Everybody I don't know. All over the planet I guess.

Where did people find out that Pluto was no longer a planet?

The orbituaries.

How many Pentagon procurement officers does it take to change a lightbulb ?

A: Look for only $87 billion we can put up this chain of fluorescent satellites that will illuminate the whole planet.

What do planets do to follow each other on SpaceTube?

Sunscribe.

Which songs do planets sing?

Neptunes.

What do you call a dog from another planet?

A dal-martian

Why did Mickey Mouse name his dog Pluto?

Because he's not a planet.

Why is Mickeys dog named Pluto?

Because hes not a planet.

Why don't we wait for life on other planets to find us?

Why do we have to do all the work

What's the first step to throwing a space party?

You planet.

How do you organize an outer space party?

You planet

What kind of music do planets listen to?

Nep-tunes.

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Revolution Jokes More Revolution Jokes

What bird is most likely to inspire a revolution?

A pigeon... "Coup, coup"

What do South American governments and internal combustion engines have in common?

Both are measured in revolutions per minute.

Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What is the longest?

Life without parole

What's the biggest joke of all time?

My life. My entire goddamned life.

Asteroid Jokes More Asteroid Jokes

Why are asteroids so strong when they hit the planet?

Because they take a steroid.

What type of dinosaurs roamed the Mediterranean before the asteroid hit?

Falafel Raptors. (sorry)

People Jokes More People Jokes

What does an EA-18 and Bob Marley have in common?

They both are jamming people.

Why do most people from Russia wear track suits?

Because they are Russin'

Solar System Jokes More Solar System Jokes

Why did the Anti vaccinator leave the solar system?

Because he found mercury in it.

How does our solar system organize a party?

They Planet

Nasa Jokes More Nasa Jokes

How does NASA prepare for an organized event?

They planet!

What's the difference between an astronaut and a NASA intern?

One's constantly preparing for lunch.

Confirm Jokes More Confirm Jokes

Why did the woman take her third aborted fetus to see the priest on Sunday?

Half Life 3 Confirmed!

Why did the snail cross the road ?

It is not clear yet , let it cross the road first. Update : It has been confirmed that it was to meet the Chicken who crossed the road earlier.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

What do you do if a blonde throws a pin at you?

RUN! She's got a grenade in her mouth!

Whoever answers my next question, can go home One boy throws his bag out the window. Teacher: Who just threw that?

Boy: Me and I'm going home now.