Quarter Jokes

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese

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What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?

I want my quarter back!

Why did the football coach go to Aldi?

To get his quarter back!

How do you know when the Moon is going broke?

When it's down to it's last quarter.

What do you call an anorexic with thrush?

A quarter pounder with cheese

How many quarters does it take to play the Lord of the rings pinball game?

None, it only takes Tolkiens

What is the difference?

What its the difference between a quarter and a guy? Neither gets had when you want tail

What do you call an anorexic blonde with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese !

What denomination are the coins in Super Mario Bros?

They're dollar coins, because a quarter is two bits, which means a dollar is 8 bits.

What is McDonald's demolition service called?

Quarter pounder.

What time was it?

A quarter to three.

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What do you get if you cross a bee with a quarter of a pound of ground beef?

A humburger.

What does an American call a Canadian Dollar?

A quarter.

Why couldn't the pirate use the bubblegum vending machine?

Because there is no quarter for the wicked.

Why are you begging for a quarter?

Beggar: I didn't think someone like you would give me a dollar.

What do you call an Ethiopian with a piece of cheese on his head?

Quarter pounder with cheese!

What is that behind your ear?

Nice try, too old for the coin trick" "No it's a tumor" "Oh my god" "Kidding it's a quarter"

What do you call an anorexic chick with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese

What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it?

Money's tight these days!

How did Chad Kroeger lose a quarter?

Everyone who bought his tickets wanted their nickelback

What's the difference between a blonde and a phone booth?

A1: You need a quarter to use the phone.

Why is the moon like a dollar?

It has four quarters.

How is your mom just like a laundromat?

For a dollar in quarters she will take my load.

What is Meghan Trainor's favorite instrument?

A double quarter pounder with cheese.

What goes into the mouth of a quarter horse?

Two bits!

What do u call an anorexic women with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese.

Why did the football player tackle the phone booth?

To get his quarter back! Hahahahahha

How much does he give the cashier?

2 dollars, so he gets a quarter back.

Why couldn't Led Zeppelin play pinball?

They had No Quarter

Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickle?

Because it had more cents

What's my rating from 1 to 10 for Harry Potter?

Nine and three quarters.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What is the most offensive joke you know?

I'm bored tonight and I have a no holds barred sense of humour. What are some of your worst

What do you call someone in the army that knows the capital of every country on earth?

General Knowledge

Football Coach Jokes More Football Coach Jokes

Why did the football coach return to the bank?

To get his quarterback.

Why did the football coach go to Aldi?

To get his quarter back!

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call a guy with no musical talent that hangs out with the band?

The drummer.

What do you call a guy who likes touching unripened cheese?

A fetaphile

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

Why don't u share a bed?

cried Baby Bear.

What u call a black woman with 7 abortions?

Crimefighter

Break Jokes More Break Jokes

What'd u ask Santa for 6: a speed boat M: like a Lego boat?

6: no M: oh for the bath 6: no M: the pool 6: *doesnt break eye contact* no

How do you get banned from a subreddit without breaking the rules?

Post something humorous in . P.S: Is there anyway to ungild myself?

Ethiopian Jokes More Ethiopian Jokes

What do you call a not-hungry ethiopian?

Dead.

What do you call an Ethiopian on a hunger strike?

Ethiopian.

Ethopian Jokes More Ethopian Jokes

Why are Ethopians so fit?

Because they have to run around in the shower to get wet.

What do u call an ethopian with a slice of cheese on his head?

A quarter pounder with cheese.

Whichever Jokes More Whichever Jokes

Which do you think I should take?

Whichever you'll excel in, son."

Which presidential candidate does Tom Brady support?

Whichever can reduce inflation.