Han Jokes

What do you call miscellaneous members of Han Solo's best friend's family?

Rando Calrissians

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Which Star Wars character was arrested for drunk driving?

Han Solo. Because he took a shot first.

How does Kylo Ren talk on the phone?

A Hans free device

What did the handicapped racecar driver say?

I have no Hans"

How long does it take Han Solo to screw in a light bulb?

less than twelve parsecs.

What was Han Solo's reaction to being taken to the carbon-freezing chamber?

He was petrified.

How many babies does it take to stop a puck?

Ask Subban from the Hans to find out

Who Shot First? Boba Fett or Jango Fett?

Han Solo

Why does C-3PO always tell Han the Odds?

Because he can't even.

What do Han and Chewbacca use to communicate?

A wookiee talkie.

What did Han Solo say when Leia asked for help with a crossword clue?

I don't know

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Why did the Millennium Falcon hot a tree?

Because Han was flying so low.

What does Han Solo see looking into the mirror?

Han Double

Why did Harrison Ford Crash his plane?

because he was flying solo and went look no hans...

What do you call a terrible performance of Han Solo: The Musical?

A rebel without applause.

How did Han Solo enter the world?

On the perineum falcon!

Why was Leia disappointed on her wedding night?

Han shot first.

Why is Han Solo a loner?

Because he's solo.

What did Luke say at Han and Leia's wedding?

May divorce be with you

Why was Han yelling at Chewbacca on their first day on the Millenium Falcon?

Because Chewie was making too many wookie mistakes!

What do you call a Harrison Ford one man show?

A Han Solo performance.

What does Leia say when she needs help?

I think I could use a Han here.

What is Harrison Ford called when he smokes weed?

Han So-high.

What did Han.... Tell Leia after they separated?

May Divorce be with you.*

What happened to Han when Chewie wouldn't do the marathon?

He Ran Solo...

Why did Han go out Black Friday shopping.?

because the prices were Solo

How does Han Solo like to get around Endor?

Ewoks

What does Han Solo call a sick Chewbacca?

A Chewie

How's Skywalker?

Han: He was nearly frozen when I found him. Leia: And, now Han: Lukewarm. Leia: ... Han: Hehehe

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Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

What does a tree say after it gets knocked over by the wind?

I went out on a limb.

What tree gives the best high-fives?

A PALM tree!

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What do you call it when a baby tells you off?

A fedis.

Why did the blonde make love in the microwave?

A: She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What are the three biggest lies an Oklahoma State fan tells?

I WON this belt buckle, I OWN that truck, and I swear to God I was just helping that sheep over the fence.

How can you help a starving cannibal?

Give them a hand !

Phone Jokes More Phone Jokes

Why did I throw my phone out of my window?

Because I turned on airplane mode, and thought it would turn my Iphone into a plane...

What phone etiquette?

You hand me your phone, you better believe I'ma hurry & scroll through as many pics as I can before you notice.

Drunk Driving Jokes More Drunk Driving Jokes

What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving?

A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.

What is it called when you are arrested for drunk driving and you extremely regret it?

DU-WHY !

Find Jokes More Find Jokes

Why was the girl stuck in the revolving door for two weeks?

cuz she couldn't find the door handle

Why did the Red sea not find a good husband?

because she was too shallow.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the judge ask when he went to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth

What did the commitment averse monster truck announcer say to his girlfriend when she asked him, "When are you going to finally ask me to marry you?

SOMEDAY ###SOMEDAY! ###SOMEDAY!!

Kylo Ren Jokes More Kylo Ren Jokes

Why do you hide behind a mask?

Kylo Ren: *takes off his mask to reveal his real face* Rey: Wow. Put the mask back on.

How long does it take for stormtroopers to obey Kylo Ren?

Just the First Order.