Soap Jokes

What the difference between a nun in a bathtub & a nurse in the bathtub?

One has soul full of hope & one has a hole full of soap... I'll walk myself out, sorry first post here

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What's the difference between a Nun and a lady taking a bath?

The Nun has hope in her soul and the lady taking a bath has soap in her hole.

How do you make the hippie run out of money?

You hide daddies credit card under a bar of soap.

What is the difference between a girl in a church, and a girl in a bathtub?

The girl in the church has hope in her soul, and the girl In the bathtub has soap in her hole.

What's the difference between a girl that's praying and a girl that's having a bubble bath?

One has hope in her soul, The other has soap in her hole.

What's an alcoholic's favorite type of soap?

Bar soap.

Why did the boxer bring a bar of soap into the ring?

The referee said he wanted a clean fight. :D

Where's the best place to hide money from a Mexican?

Under a bar of soap.

Where is the best place to hide a hippie's weed?

Under the soap.

What happened to the boy-band member who dropped the soap In the prison shower?

Let's just say that his backstreet went more than one direction.

Why did the meteorologist bring a bar of soap to work?

He was expecting showers.

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How do you hide money from a hippie?

Put it under the soap.

What's the difference between a praying nun and a girl taking a bath?

One has hope in her soul and the other has soap in her hole

Whats the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the bathtub?

One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole.

What should you do if you see an epileptic having a seizure in a bathtub?

Throw in a load of laundry, and soap

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

What kind of soap do Middle Eastern citizens use?

Arab spring

Where's the safest place to hide money from a man?

Under the soap

What's the difference between a nun on her knees and a nun in the bath?

One has hope in their soul, the other has soap in their hole

Why did the little pig hide the soap?

He heard the farmer yell "Hogwash!"

How did Mummy know you hadn't had a bath?

Eve: I forgot to dirty the towel wet the soap and flood the bathroom.

What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub?

Answer: One has hope in her soul the other has soap in her hole.

How did your mom know you hadn't washed your face?

I forgot to wet the soap.

What's the difference between a woman in church and a woman in the bathtub?

The woman in church has hope in her soul... The woman In the bathtub has soap in her hole.

What's the difference between a nun and a woman taking a bath?

The nun has hope in her soul, and the woman has soap in her hole. EDIT: NSFW

This joke may have profanity.

Why should you never trust soap?

It's an emulsive lyer.

Who steals all the soap in the bathroom?

The robber ducky

What kind of soap do you use to clean a dirty joke?

Bawdy wash.

Which birds steal soap from the bath ?

Robber ducks !

Where's the soap?

Yes, it does." she replies.

Which villains steal soap from the bath?

Robber ducks.

How do you get a Polak out of the bath tub?

A: Throw in a bar of soap.

How do you launder money?

Put it under the soap.

Why in the hell would I clean my bathtub?

I put soap and water in there every day...

Where do you hide a hippie's weed?

Under the soap.

What did the soap say to the hands as they were being washed?

I think we're in sink."

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Boxer Jokes More Boxer Jokes

Why are boxers never late to their fights?

Because they have developed very good punch quality.

Where r my legal briefs?

Paralegal *hands him his boxers* Judge: lol Jury: We're hung Judge: ha! DA: Balls in your court Judge: DO MORE!

Nun Jokes More Nun Jokes

What do you call a nun that is lost?

A Roamin' Catholic

How many people does it take to change a lightbulb in a monastery?

Nun.

Bath Jokes More Bath Jokes

How do you call for a bath?

With a Teletubbie.

Why did the thief take a bath?

To get a clean getaway

Soul Jokes More Soul Jokes

What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub?

Answer: One has hope in her soul the other has soap in her hole.

How do you hit those high notes?

Adam Levine: I sold my soul to the devil. Interviewer: Excuse me Adam Levine: Practice.

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What did you learn in school today Son: How to write Mother: What did you write?

Son: I don't know they haven't taught us how to read yet!

What did the ant whisper into the elephant's ear that made the elephant faint?

I'm going to be the mother of your children." I have no idea whether the joke is lost in translation...

Kitchen Sink Jokes More Kitchen Sink Jokes

What was the rock band doing at the kitchen sink?

Moshing the dishes

What's the difference between a pontiff's chin and the kitchen sink?

One's covered in soap bubbles, while the other's covered in Pope stubbles.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

Why did the elephant paint his balls green?

Answer: to hide in avocado trees.. How did Tarzan die? Answer: Picking avocados

Why do golfers have the best chauffeurs?

Because they're good at picking their drivers.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

How many ladies have you slept with?

she said. I said, "Do you want me to round it to the nearest 10 " She raised her eyebrows and said, "OK..." I said, "Zero."

Why did the bodybuilder buy a dictionary?

Because he wanted to get more definition.