Hide Jokes

What's your favorite game if you wear a turban?

Hide-and-Sikh

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

Why can't you play hide and go seek with a Pokemon?

Because he'll peek-at-chu!

How do you protect a valuable instrument?

A: Hide it in an accordion case.

Why do you hide behind a mask?

Kylo Ren: *takes off his mask to reveal his real face* Rey: Wow. Put the mask back on.

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

What do Anne Frank and Bin Laden have in common?

They're both hide and seek champions!

Why did the hotel manager refuse to rent his rooms out to people?

He needed places to hide the bodies.

What do turtles do for fun?

Play hide and shell.

Why did the elephant paint his toenails red ?

So he could hide in the cherry tree !

Why couldn't the leopard play Q: Why couldn't the leopard play hide and seek?

A: Because he was always spotted.

Where is the worst place to play hide and seek in a hospital?

In the I.C.U.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug
5.0

Coffee Mug

How do you starve a Socialist?

You hide their food stamps under their work boots. Edit Thank you /u/DoctorBrohoof for my first gold!

Where is the worst place to hide in a hospital?

In the ICU.

Why do you carry a knife?

Me: A sword is harder to hide.

Why aren't the Eagles worried about big cats sneaking up on them?

They know there ain't no way to hide those lion eyes.

How are we out already?

ME: *hiding dog that I wrapped up like a mummy* it's a mystery I guess

Why are there so many piggy banks?

Pigs don't like to hide their money in the mattress.

Where do you hide a hippie's weed?

Under the soap.

When the lumberjacks sawed down the tree where did the Gorilla hiding in the uppermost branches land?

Nearby - the Ape-lle doesn't fall far from the tree!

How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out?

Hide their trainers.

Why do women aged 40+ not play hide and seek?

cause nobody would be looking for them.

Why don't more dinosaurs join the police force?

They can't hide behind billboards.

Why do women over 40 don't play hide and seek?

Because nobody is looking for them.

What was in those drums of chemicals Captain Malcolm Reynolds hid behind in Firefly?

For-Mal-To-Hide.

What do 1% of racist people do?

They are making clubs like the KKK The other 99% are hidden here making bad jokes

Why did the elephant paint himself with different colours?

Because he wanted to hide in the colouring box !

Why do elephants paint their toenails red?

So they can hide in strawberry patches.

What do you call a blond skeleton in the closet?

The winner of hide and seek.

What will I have at the end of the day?

Three bags of skittles and a small body to hide.

Why don't you find hippopotamuses hiding in trees?

They're really good at it.

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Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

Why did New York get all the lawyers, and New Jersey all the toxic waste sites?

New Jersey picked first.

What's do Christians and politicians have in common?

They pick and choose what they want to believe.

Chicken Jokes More Chicken Jokes

Why are chickens never virgins?

A: Because when they're born they get laid.

What did the Spanish farmer say to his chickens?

A: Oh-lay!

Google Jokes More Google Jokes

Why didn't the monk sell his temple?

Thought of this one on my own while playing WoW a couple days ago and I'm pretty sure it hasn't been told before. I like corny jokes. I Googled it and didn't find anything (:

What do Intel, Google, Uber, eBay, McDonalds, Budweiser, AT&T, Oracle, Disney, Boeing, IBM and Apple have in common?

Immigrants

Save Jokes More Save Jokes

How do you save a pirate's life?

C P Arrr!

How does a Nun save herself from being poisoned?

Nun chucks.

Republican Jokes More Republican Jokes

What do you call a republican fashion director?

Clothed minded

How are that many Republicans candidates supposed to debate each other at once?

Throw a dollar bill in the floor and let the last one alive run for president.

Loudest Noise Jokes More Loudest Noise Jokes

Why did the elephant paint his balls red?

What makes the loudest noise in the jungle?

Why do elephants paint their testicles red?

So they can hide in cherry trees. Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Shows you it works then. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? Monkeys picking cherries.

Pokemon Jokes More Pokemon Jokes

What Pokemon can you find at Auschwitz?

Gastly

What did Ash tell his Pokemon?

Pokemon Go!

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What does A&ampW stand for?

Amburgers &amp Woot Beer! Edit: Thanks to my dad for this one.

What's a swear word?

Me: A bad word moms and dads only say when they're mad.3:Me:3: Is my middle name a swear word