Snail Jokes

What do you call a snail on a sail boat?

A snailor

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What did the snail say while riding on the turtle's back?

Wheeeeeee!

What do you call a shipping crate full of snails?

Escargot.

Why did God give women legs?

Because he saw the mess that snails left behind!

What did the snail say when he jumped on the turtle's back?

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"

What do you call a Muslim slug?

A snail...

What did the snail on the turtles back say?

WEEEEEEEEEE!

Why arent there any French Restaurants in Davy Jones Locker?

Dead men sell no snails!

What did one snail say to the other snail?

It...all...happened...soooooooo...fast

What did the snail say when he was riding on the back of the turtle?

Weeeeeeeeee

What did the snail say as he rode on the back of a turtle?

A: Wheeee!

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What happens when two snails fight?

A: They slug it out.

Why did the snail cross the road ?

It is not clear yet , let it cross the road first. Update : It has been confirmed that it was to meet the Chicken who crossed the road earlier.

What did the snail say while riding on the back of the tortoise?

Wheeeee!!!! --hey, at least it's a fun joke for kids!

What did the slug say to the snail?

Would you like a copy of the big issue

What is stronger an elephant or a snail ?

A snail because it carries it's house an elephant just carries its trunk !

What did one snail say to the other?

Nothing. They were both decoys.

What are snails trying to do?

Their best

What did the snail say when put on top of a turtle?

Weeeeeeeeeeee

What did the snail say when he rode a turtle?

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! I'll see myself out.

How does a snail win a race?

It runs against Hillary.

What do you do when two snails have a fight?

Leave them to slug it out.

What gas do snails prefer?

Shell.

What do you get if you cross Dracula with a snail?

The world's slowest vampire.

What did the snail say when his friend lost his car?

Where did Es-car-go.

Why did the snail draw an "S" on the side of his car?

So that when he drove by people could say, "Look at that escargot!"

What do you get if you cross a vampire with a snail?

I don't know but it would slow him down.

What did the snail say when he hitched a ride on the turtle?

A. Wheeeee!!!!!

How do snails get their shells all shiny?

They use snail polish.

Why doesnt McDonalds serve snail?

Because of sanitation reasons.

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Turtle Jokes More Turtle Jokes

Why did you jump on a turtle?

Me: Because I'm a plumber

What do you call Dana Carvey standing on the back of Dana Carvey?

Turtles all the way down

Elephant Jokes More Elephant Jokes

What's grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?

An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!

Why do ducks have webbed feet?

To stomp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out the burning ducks.

Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happened when King Kong swallowed Big Ben?

He found time-consuming.

What happens when you shoot a black man?

You go to jail for impersonating a police officer...

Mess Jokes More Mess Jokes

Why doesn't Jesus enjoy manicures or pedicures?

Because they always try to mess with his nails.

Who's there ! Answer ! Answer who ?

Answer all over your porch ! It's a mess out here !

Trunk Jokes More Trunk Jokes

How many aardvarks can ride on an elephant?

Six... three on the back and three in the trunk!

What does an elephant say when it kidnaps someone?

Get in the trunk"

Snailor Jokes More Snailor Jokes

What do you call a snail in the Navy?

A Snailor

What do you call a snail on a sail boat?

A snailor

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

What did UK say while leaving?

It's not EU, it's me

Where can you find a paraplegic man?

Right where you left him.

Shell Jokes More Shell Jokes

What do you call a girl shell?

A she shell.

Why did the shell not go to the beach?

Because he was self-CONCH-ious.