Roman Jokes

What's a pirate's favourite Roman numeral?

You might think it's II, but his true love be the C.

Interactive Joke of the Day Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

Why can't Roman Reigns light a campfire?

Because he doesn't carry any matches!

Why did the Romans pay their soldiers in salt?

So they would end up with seasoned veterans.

Why should you never high-five a Roman?

They might give you Hi-V back!

What do you call a Roman with a wet mustache and a smile?

Gladiator.

What did the Roman say when the Greek accused him of stealing his gods?

It was all a myth-take!

What do you call a lost legion?

A Roman army

How many Roman pirates does it take to change a light bulb?

I I

What is zero in Roman numerals?

Nothing

Why were all Roman buildings made of stone?

They crucified the carpenter.

How did the Roman cut his hair?

Caesar

Couple's Daily Question Mug

5.0

Coffee Mug

What did the Ancient Romans use to cut their hair?

Caesars.

What do you call a Roman fighter with curly hair in his teeth?

Gladiator. (Glad he ate her)

What do you get when you ask for a Roman pinch hitter?

An Italian sub!

What did jesus say to the romans after he rose on the third day and talked about their behavior?

Yall nailed it.

What do Romans use to cut their pizza?

Little Caesars.

What did the Romans say to each other after crucifying Jesus?

Nailed it!"

Why are 490 Romans funny?

Because XD

What do you call a Roman warrior with hair in his mouth?

Gladiator Get it? Glad He Ate Her..

How did Roman magistrates keep fit?

Pontius Pilates.

What did the old Frankish barbarians say to the Roman invasion?

You don't have the to do it!"

Why was Jesus I such good shape?

Crossfit. Why did the Romans hate Jesus so much? He wouldn't shut up about crossfit.

How did the Romans split up their empire?

With a pair of Caesars. (Thanks )

What did the Roman premature ejaculater say?

Veni, Vidi, Veni.

Why was the dieting Roman so thrilled?

His toga size went from L to XL.

What was a poor Roman citizen's favorite breakfast?

Fruity Plebbles.

What's it called when a Roman sees too many flashing colors?

A Julius Seizure.

How many Romans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Why did the Romans build straight roads ?

So their soldiers didn't go around the bend !

Why didn't the Romans find algebra very challenging?

Because X was always 10

What do Romans say when their wives run away?

Caesar!

What mouse was a Roman emperor ?

Julius Cheeser !

When in Rome do as the Romans you know?

Slaughters entire office and imposes grain taxes on peasantry

What do you call a Roman with pubic hair in his teeth?

Gladiator

What is it called when a Roman gets really sick?

Chicken Pox Romana

What do you call a smiling Roman with a hair in his teeth?

Gladiator.

What taste good?

Tender: I usually like rum in Diet Coke. Man: how do you get a Roman in a Diet Coke Tender: *facepalm*

Why did the roman only smoke 490 blunts and not 500?

Because XD

Why are 490 Romans are funny ?

Because XD Edit : Sorry about the typo the second are is not supposed to be here

What people travel the most?

Romans.

What is a Roman wrestlers favorite meal?

JOHN CENA

What do you call a Roman with a hair in his teeth?

Gladiator.

What Roman dictator suffered from Epilepsy?

Julius Seizure.

What did Romans use to cut pizza before the rolling cutter was invented?

Lil Caesars

You might also enjoy:

Britney Spears Jokes More Britney Spears Jokes

What do you call a British guy who throws a spear through the knee?

Britney Spears

What's the best defense against Britney Spears?

Brooke Shields.

Wear Jokes More Wear Jokes

Why did the mermaid wear sea shells?

Cause she was too big for B- shells! (my 6 year old niece likes to tell this joke)

What do you call a person who wears adult diapers?

Ehh, it depends.

True Love Jokes More True Love Jokes

What do ghosts call their true love?

Their ghoul-friend

What's the difference between love, true love, and showing off?

Spitting, swallowing, and gargling.

Hi Jokes More Hi Jokes

What do you do when your suicidal friend asks for a hi-five?

You leave him hanging....

What did the little mountain say to the big mountain?

Hi, Cliff "

C Jokes More C Jokes

Why can't a Pirate make it through their ABC's?

They always get lost at C.

What's a pirates favourite letter?

You may think it's "Arrr", but nay, his first love be the "C".

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why didn't Jesus start a charity?

Cuz they're not for prophets.

What do you call someone who likes to dress up like Jesus?

A cross-dresser.

Roman Soldier Jokes More Roman Soldier Jokes

What did the roman soldier say after crucifying Jesus?

Nailed it

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What will never be read in braille?

Do not touch.

Why do liberals travel in threes?

A: One to read one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.