Greet Jokes

How do Soviet prison mates greet each other?

Gulag to you too.

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How does a French soldier greet his comrades?

Salut!

How does a Redditor greet a woman from Kuala Lumpur?

M'alaydy

How does a neckbeard greet a tree?

Good day, m'hogany'

How do Mexicans greet Dr. Seuss?

Jesus!

How did one pothead greet the other?

High

How do two psychiatrists greet each other?

You are fine, how am I?"

How do you greet the cold horse across the fence?

Howdy Neigh - Brr Made up by my 4 year old son.

Who you must not greet on a plane?

HI Jack!

How do you greet a Rastafarian who's out of work?

jahbless

How do two lawyers greet each other?

With a firm handshake.

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How does a french alcoholic greet someone?

Enchantr."

How does a Facebook employee greet each other?

Hey there, whatsapp!!

What did the Catholic Mexican say to greet the Greek God of Thunder?

hey zeus!"

How do Israeli skiiers greet each other?

Shlalom! (Oy, that's terrible.)

How do German bread greet each other?

Gluten tag!

How do genetically engineered car salesmen from Boston greet their customers?

Hey, gattaca? GATTACA?

How did Maxwell greet Ampre?

Good Faraday to you, sir!

How does a frog greet a rabbit during the holiday season?

Hoppy holidays, and have a hoppin New Hare! Happy holidays everyone.

How did the Mexican greet people in Hawaii?

Ahola.

How do you greet an overweight Micronesian when you're trying to sound cool?

Microsoft Word.

How do skeletons greet each other?

Bon'nichiwa

How do epileptics greet people?

They shake.

How do sheep greet each other at Christmas ?

A merry Christmas to ewe

How do you greet a slice of bread in Germany?

Gluten tag! Ba-dum tss.

What does an excited karate pupil say to his friend when greeting him?

HIYAH!

How does a viola greet a relative?

Cello!

How do you greet a British programmer named Cathryn?

Allo-cate

How do 2 psychics greet each other?

Hello, how am I " "You're fine, how am I "

How do angels greet each other?

They say Halo.

What sort of aircraft does the Asian pilot who loves to greet people fly?

A herrocopter

How does a pirate greet a sea monster?

What's Kraken

How does gravity greet itself?

It just waves

What would you like to Instagram?

how waiters should greet people

How did one gold atom greet the other gold atom?

ey you.

What is the farmers favorite way to greet someone?

Hay!"

How do you greet a German baker?

Gluten Tag

How do you greet people at a funeral?

Mourning, everybody!

How do Hawaiian Muslims greet each other?

Aloha Akbar!"

What did the German baker say to greet his customers?

Gluten tag!

How do French poodles greet each other?

A: Bone-jour.

How to cats greet each other at Christmas ?

A furry merry Christmas & Happy mew year" !

How did Maxwell greet Ampere?

Good Faraday to you, sir!

How do nudists greet each other?

With a bare hug.

How do you greet a three-headed monster?

Hi, hi, hi.

How do salespeople traditionally greet each other?

Hi. Nice to meet you. I'm better than you."

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Lawyer Jokes More Lawyer Jokes

How many judges does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one he holds it still and the whole world revolves around him. Just one but two lawyers have to explain him how to do it.

What's the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

A)..... The rooster clucks defiance.

Thunder Jokes More Thunder Jokes

Why did Thor file a police report?

Because someone stole his thunder

What did the thunder say when it understood the joke?

I feel so enlightninged!

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

Why does Mexjco do poorly in the olympics?

Because all the Mexicans who can run fast, swim fast and jump high are in the states.

What happened to the Mexican after he took heroin for the third time?

He over 'd

Good Day Jokes More Good Day Jokes

How does a neckbeard greet a tree?

Good day, m'hogany'

What's the best day of the week to marry your gaming console?

Wednesday

Engineer Jokes More Engineer Jokes

Why do engineers work out a lot?

They're obsessed with rigid bodies!

What kind of ears does an engine have?

Engineers

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

Why did Jesus have a six pack?

It was from all the cross-training...

What did the people who hung Jesus to the cross say?

Nailed it

Work Jokes More Work Jokes

What did the buffalo say to his boy before leaving for work?

Bye, son.

Why did the bowling pins stop working?

They went on strike!

4 Year Old Jokes More 4 Year Old Jokes

What does that tell you?

4-year-old: I won.

What was that?

4-year-old: Nothing. Me: 4: Me: OK. Parenting is easier than it looks.