Sneeze Jokes

Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze!

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Why did everybody where white pants at The Masters?

Dustin Johnson sneezed.

Why do seals swim in salt water?

Cause pepper makes them sneeze.

What do you call a football fan with a cold?

A sneezing ticket holder.

Why do fish swim in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

Why do the sharks only swim in salt water?

because they would sneeze in pepper water.

Why do sharks like salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze

What would you name someone who can predict when people sneeze?

Nostrildamus

What do you say when a virgin sneezes?

Goesintight.

What did the girl say when the Statue of Liberty sneezed?

God bless America.

What do you call someone who sneezes doing cocaine?

A snowblower

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What do you do when a Chihuahua sneezes?

Get a small hankie!

Why do sharks live in salt water?

Pepper water makes them sneeze.

What does a South American say after someone sneezes?

Belize you.

Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed?

To catch her false teeth.

What did the cashew say to the sneezing peanut?

Yes, what is it "

What did the baby elephant get when the daddy elephant sneezed ?

Out of the way !

Why do sharks swim in salt water?

Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

What illness makes you sneeze on your laptop screen?

A computer virus!

Why don't dead people sneeze?

Because they're too busy coffin.

How can you tell when a blonde rejects a new brain transplant?

A: She sneezes.

Why do sharks only swim in salt water?

Got this is a Cracker Jack box) Because pepper water makes them sneeze!

What sounds do nuts make when they sneeze?

Cashew

What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute ?

My cat would be dead before I got 50

What do you say when God sneezes?

Go bless yourself.

Who's there ! Bless ! Bless who ?

I didn't sneeze !

What happened to the witch with an upside down nose?

Every time she sneezed her hat blew off.

What do sneezes wear on their feet?

A: Ahhh-shoes.

What does a nut say when it sneezes?

Cashew.

What do you get when a dragon sneezes?

Out of the way. Thanks League smh

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Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

Why do babies love sticking things in their mouth?

And why doesn't my girlfriend share this impulse?

What's the thing that is about 5-6 inches long, it goes into mouth and when you rub it back and forth it produces a white liquid?

A toothbrush.

Bless Jokes More Bless Jokes

Why did God bless Texas?

He didn't want to upset Chuck Norris.

Why does Martin Luther King like jam?

Because God bless America

Old Lady Jokes More Old Lady Jokes

Why did the old lady cover her mouth with her hands when she sneezed?

To catch her false teeth.

Why did it take three burly Boy Scouts to help the old lady across the street?

A: Because she didn't want to go.

Way Jokes More Way Jokes

How do you fit an elephant in a teacup?

You take the f out of way. say it out loud if you don't get it

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Not sure, first they have to figure out which way to spin it.

Seal Jokes More Seal Jokes

What type of animals are put on envelopes?

Seals.

What's the difference between a seal and a sealion?

An electron

Scottish Jokes More Scottish Jokes

What's a Scottish cannibal's favorite food?

Mac in cheese

What did the Scottish man do when he ran out of pants to wear?

He kilt himself

South American Jokes More South American Jokes

How many South American's does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A Brazilian.

What do you call a rich South American?

A Brazilianaire!

Cocaine Jokes More Cocaine Jokes

What do you call someone who sneezes doing cocaine?

A snowblower

What is the difference between a baby and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would NEVER drop a bag of cocaine.