Pant Jokes

Where do I put my pants?

He said, "Over there by mine."

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What do blondes do after they comb their hair?

They pull up their pants.

Why is a dog so warm in Summer?

He wears a coat and pants.

What's the difference between Cottage Cheese and Cream Cheese?

I didn't cottage in my pants

When is an aardvark jumpy?

When he's got ants in his pants!

Why did the Priest go to Walmart?

Because the little boys pants were half off.

Why were the suspenders arrested?

A: For holding up a pair of pants.

What film do you get when you pull your pants down?

Free Willy

How do you think his pants fit him?

Like a glove.

What did the tree do when he got really nervous?

He SOILed his pants I'llseemyselfout...

What is Marios favorite type of pants?

Denim Denim Denim

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What are Mario and Luigi's favorite type of pants?

Denim, Denim, Denim

What pants do ghosts wear?

BOO jeans.

What kind of pants does the Pink Panther wear?

Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Denim Deniiiiim

What's Mario's favorite type of pants?

DenimDenimDenim*

What is the sharpest thing in the world?

A fart. It will cut through your pants and not even leave a hole.

What do I have?

Someone else's pants.

What are the best clothes to wear to the dance club?

Boots and pants and boots and pants and boots and pants...

What's 6 inches long hard, bent, and in my pants?

My iPhone 6

What do you get when you cross a telephone with a pair of pants?

Bell-bottoms!

What did the pirate say with a steering wheel down his pants?

YARRR, IT'S DRIVIN' ME NUTS!!!"

Why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?

The pirate says, "I don't know, but it's driving me nuts!"

What did the pirate with a steering wheel in his pants say when he couldn't remember why it was there?

Arrrh, it's driving me nuts

How does a pair of pants feel when it is ironed?

A: Depressed.

What kind of pants does agent Mulder wear?

Just a pair 'a normal pants.

What's the first rule here, boys?

Kid:Don't poop your pants M:I was gonna say "have fun" but...OK.

Why do little girls put fishes down their pants?

So the can smell like big girls!

How do Vampires buy pants if they can't look in a mirror?

Now, I tweet them

Why does a golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he gets a hole in one!

Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?

In case he got a hole-in-one.

What's the difference between Super Man and Spider Man ?

Super Man wears his underwear over his pants..

What does a tight pair of pants and a cheap motel have in common?

No ballroom.

Why, Bro?

B1: Men with no pants... Fighting for a belt... WTF

Why no pants on?

We think he tried to jump into his pants & fell

Why did the Snowman pull his pants down?

Because the snowblower was coming.

Why bro?

Men with no pants fighting for a belt.. WTF

Why do firemen wear red suspenders?

To keep their pants up.

When does a Smurf pull his pants down?

Once in a blue moon.

How do yo get to Sesame Street?

Unzip my pants and ask big bird

What do Wal mart and priests have in common?

They both have boys pants half off. I'm going to hell lol

What kind of pants do the Super Mario Bros. wear?

Denim denim denim..... I'll see myself out.

Did you know you should always take an extra pair of pants golfing?

Just in case you get a hole in one.

What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo jeans.

Why did the belt go to prison?

He held up a pair of pants!

Why did the fireman wear red, white, and blue suspenders?

To hold his pants up.

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Majority Jokes More Majority Jokes

Why are the majority of school shooters white?

Because the black kids don't wanna get kicked off the basketball team.

What are the three types of men?

A: The handsome the caring and the majority.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What do you call a dog without front legs?

Chester.

Why did the dog wear white sneakers ?

Because his boots were at the menders !

Emergency Jokes More Emergency Jokes

When can you count on a hamburger in an emergency?

When the chips are down!

Why do women and children evacuate first in an emergency?

So the men can go on Reddit and repost this joke.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What did Yoda say to Luke when he was constipated?

Try or try not, there is no do.

What kind of noise annoys an oyster ?

A noisy noise annoys an oyster ! (Try saying that fast!)

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call a corn cob on a track team?

A maize runner. Credit goes to my girlfriend.

What do you call a trombone player who just broke up with his girlfriend?

Homeless.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What does a PASCAL programmer say to a C programmer?

A: "Would you like fries with that "

What do Anna Nicole Smith and Tom Brady have in common?

They both like saggy balls.

Type Jokes More Type Jokes

What type of cheese can you see in a mirror?

Halloumi! (Hello me)

What type of bees make milk?

Boo bees

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

What's better than a paradox?

A pair of nurses

Why can't two elephants go swimming?

They only have one pair of trunks.