Snowman Jokes

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

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Why couldn't anyone trust the snowman to do anything?

He was kinda flakey

What did one Snowman say to the other Snowman?

Can you smell carrot?

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?

Snowballs.

Why did the snowman get fired from his job?

He was a snow call, snow show.

What's the difference between snowmen and snow women?

Snow balls. Ha

What does snowman say to the other snowman?

What does snowman say to the other snowman? - It smells of carrots!

When is it too cold to build a snowman?

When the frostbite is worse then the frostbark.

Why was the snowman smiling?

He saw the snowblower coming

How do snowmen get around?

By icicle.

What do you get if you cross a shark with a snowman?

An empty playground

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Where do snowmen go to dance?

The snowball!

Why is it impossible to surprise a snowman?

He has ice in the back of his head. Get it He has ice in the back of his head. Get it

What did the snowman say when he got coal for Christmas?

I can see!

What did the snowman do when he saw a snow blower go by?

Pull down his pants.

Why did the snowman pull down his pants?

Because he saw the snowblower coming

Where does a snowman keep his money?

In a snow bank!

Why aren't snowmen called snow women?

Because they're in the kitchen melting.

Why did the snowman have his pants down?

Because he heard the snowblower was coming.

What's orange and sounds like a carrot!!!????

A snowman blowing his nose!!!!!!!!

Why did Frosty the snowman pull down his pants?

He heard the snow-blower was coming.

How do you make a Snowman smile?

Tell him the snowblower is coming.

Why can't you trust a snowman?

Because they're all a bunch of flakes

Why did the snowman take his pants off?

He heard the snow blower was coming.

Why did the snowman have a smile on his face?

Because the snowblower was coming down the block.

What happens when you mix a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite

What do you call a snowman in the summer?

A puddle"

What did Jack Frost say to Frosty the Snowman?

Have an ice day!

What do Snowmen call their offspring?

Chill-dren.

What would you get if you crossed a snowman and a vampire?

Frostbite !

What did the Abominable Snowman do after he had had his teeth pulled out?

He ate the dentist.

How do snowmen travel around ?

By iceicle !

Why did the snowman smile?

Because the snowblower is coming.

Where do snowmen put their webpages?

On the winternet.

What is the best joke you have heard that was on the end of a Popsicle stick?

Here is mine: Q: Where do snowmen dance --------- A: At the snowball. Best joke at the end of a Popsicle stick

Where do snowmen go to dance ?

Snowballs !

Where do snowmen keep their money ?

In a snowbank !

What do you get if cross a snowman and a shark ?

Frost bite !

What di you call a snowman in may?

A puddle!

Why was the snowman infertile?

He had snow balls

Where does a snowman put his birthday candles?

On his birthday flake!

Why did the snowman call his dog Frost ?

Because frost bites !

How do you scare a snowman?

You get a hairdryer!

Why did Frosty the Snowman want a divorce?

Because he thought his wife was a flake.

What happens when breed a shark and snowman?

You get a frostbite!

What does the snowman call his wife?

Snowblower

What does a snowman say to his son on his birthday?

dad joke) Happy Brr-day son!

What did the snowman and his wife put over their baby's crib?

A: A snowmobile!

How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed ?

You wake up wet !

What kind of money do snowmen use?

Iced lolly.

How do snowmen read their e-mails?

With an icy-stare!

What two letters of the alphabet do snowmen prefer ?

I.C. !

Why does it take longer to make a snow woman than a Snowman?

Because you have to hollow out the head.

Who doesn't like to sit in front of the fire?

A Snowman.

Why did the snowman leave his wife?

Because she got plowed by another man.

How does a Snowman get to work?

By icicle.

What do snowmen wear on their heads ?

Ice caps !

What did the Mexican princess ask her sister?

Tijuana build a snowman

Why did the Snowman pull his pants down?

Because the snowblower was coming.

How did the snowman get happy?

The snowblower came around

What did the sun say after melting Frosty the Snowman?

I came, I thaw, I conquered .

What would happen if you were to cross two snowmen with three vampires?

You would get severe frostbite.

Why is it quicker to build a snowman than a snowwoman?

It takes too long to hollow out her head. (I got this one from my uncle)

What did one snowman say to the other snow man?

Do you smell carrot?

What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.

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What do you get when you cross a mexican, a queer, and an eskimo?

A snow-blower that doesn't work.

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Where do people have the curliest and blackest hair?

In Africa.

Why was the army recruiter in the nursery?

To find more people for the infantry! I'm sorry.

Freeze Jokes More Freeze Jokes

How do you make a dog go meow?

Freeze it and run it through a bandsaw. MEEEOWW!!

What do freezing rain and cake icing have in common?

Both are a glaze

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How many assholes does it take to change a lightbulb?

It doesn't matter, mine itches so bad it's on fire, providing plenty of light for everyone in the room!

When is it okay to spit an arab woman in the face?

When her moustache is on fire!

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Why did the snowman smile?

Because the snowblower is coming.

What do you call an arrogant patronizing thief coming down the stairs?

A condescending con descending.

Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a violin and a viola?

A viola burns longer.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon?

One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

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What did celery say when he broke up with his girlfriend?

She wasn't right for me, so I really don't carrot all.

What is orange and sounds like a parrot?

A carrot. :

Carpet Jokes More Carpet Jokes

What do Mexican's put under their carpet?

Underlay

What did Shakespeare say when his dog messed up the carpet?

Out, damned spot! Out, I say!"*