Fall Jokes

Why do clumsy people get married?

They fall in love.

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Why did the librarian slip and fall on the library floor?

A: Because she was in the non-friction section.

What happened when the two lovers were watching a scary movie in a year when Valentine's day happened to fall on Friday the 13th?

Oh wait, nevermind. I'm an idiot...*

Why did the boy fall off his bike?

A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

What did Helen Keller say when she fell into the snow?

Nothing, she was wearing mittens.

What did the mexican say when the 2 houses fell on him?

Get off me holmes!

Why couldn't prehistoric man send birthday cards?

The stamps kept falling off the rocks!

Why did broke man fall over?

He ran out of balance

What's the problem with radioactive underpants?

Chernobyl fall out..

Which way will it fall?

If a rooster lays an egg on a pointed roof, which way will it land Roosters don't lay eggs

How did Hellen Keller break her arms when she fell down a well?

She was shouting for help.

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Where do you take a Chihuahua that has fallen into a lake?

To a weterinarian!

How do you know if you've fallen in love with an apple from France?

Your heart goes "pomme pomme ... pomme pomme ..."

What is the worst joke you have ever Heard?

I'll start it off: Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

How did the blonde die drinking milk?

A: The cow fell on her.

What do you call a fallen tree in a forest?

Natural log. Sorry about the math joke.

What did pikachu say when ash fell off a cliff?

Pikachu, that's all he can say.

How long does it take for a newborn to fall from the empire state building?

About 16 seconds

Why did the airplane fall out of the sky?

Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What do cannonballs do when they fall in love?

They make bbs

How did the lumberjack keep his business from falling behind when all the trees ran out?

By moving faux wood. Rimshot

What did the woman from Finland say after seeing an old man fall in the water, knowing he couldn't swim?

Oh no, Helsinki! He Finnish!"

What's the difference between an 8 year old and a big bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall off a balcony

What's the difference between a guy falling from the 20th or the 1st floor of a building?

20th floor fall goes: *Aaaaaah, BAM!* 1st floor fall goes: *BAM, Aaaaah!*

What's the last thing you hear before a pubic hair falls to the ground?

spits*

What is a moo hoo for a cow that fell into the thresher?

Ground round!

Why couldn't the bike stand up on its own?

It was two-tired. *Slaps knee* *Prosthetic leg falls off*

Why USD erected so fast?

Why falling US$ erected so fast after GFC

How did the geologist develop a career as an expert in sinkholes?

He fell into it.

Why did the black boy fall off his bike?

He didn't. He fell off your bike.

What did the horse say when he fell over?

Help! I've fallen and I can't giddy up."

What did Helen Keller say when she fell off the cliff?

Nothing, she had her mittens on.

Why do bicycles always fall down if unsupported?

Because they're two-tired.

Why did Timmy fall off the swings?

Didn't have any hands.. (the real punch line) Knock knock.. Who's there Not Timmy..

Why was Pablo Escobar always falling asleep?

He was **narco**leptic.

What did the squirrel say when he fell out of the tree and broke his leg?

AAAAAUUUUUUGGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

What did the cholo say when two houses fell on him?

Get off me, homes!" My brother heard this on Tosh.

What do you call 2 metalheads falling in love?

A match maiden heaven

Why do black people from west Africa never go on cruises?

They're not falling for that again.

What's white & falls from the sky?

The coming of the Lord." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! ...please enjoy this tweet. I'm going to hell.

Why is the new Brexit diet so popular?

All you gotta be is a little more than halfway into it and the pounds will start falling.

What do you call a Christian who fell down the stairs?

A couple of steps closer to their final destination.

What did the undertaker say as the coffin fell out of the car?

We'll have to rehearse that."

Why don't Mexicans have BBQ s?

Because beans always fall through the grill.

Why shouldn't you have a conversation under a tree in the fall?

There may be leavesdropping

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree?

It died.

Why wasn't drinking permitted on the Oregon trail?

It was important not to fall off the wagon.

Why do doctors slap babies bums when then are born?

Because the balls fall off of the stupid ones.

What is one of the funniest simple joke you have ever heard?

Literally... made you die laughing e.g. Why did the monkey fall of the tree bc it died e.g. How do you keep an idiot in suspense

What did the tree say to the lumberjack?

I'm falling for you

What do you call a Rwandan tribe falling down a hill?

Tutsi Roll.

What do you get when a piano falls down a mine shaft?

A flat minor.

What happens if an axe falls on your car?

You have an ax-i-dent (accident).

What material does Cayde-6 use to repair his armor after falling feet first into hell?

Nathan Filaments ( ) X-Post from /r/DestinyTheGame

Why are there no good jokes about engineers?

zzzzzzzzz, wait, I fell asleep at the punchline.

What did Harry Potter say when he fell down the hill?

Ouch! I Hermione!"

What's that, turkey?

GOBBLE GOBBLE Timmy fell in a well GOBBLE GOBBLE breaks turkey's neck no time for your riddles, in the oven you go

What is Sherlock's favorite season?

Fall...

Why did the little piglet fall in love with the hog?

Because he was such a sloppy dresser.

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a 4-year old child?

Eric Clapton never would have let his bag of coke fall out a 53rd-story window!

Wheres the dinosaur bone exhibit?

through that door" Thank you very ruff! "What'd you say " *2 dogs fall out of trench coat & run*

Why did the Caucasian gymnast fall off the balance beam while on television?

Because the white balance was off on the camera.

How did the Pharaoh feel after falling for a craigslist scam?

Egypt

Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs?

He was shot in the face.

What does a robot do at the end of one night stand?

He falls off

What do you call a pc that fell in the ocean?

A Dell rolling in the deep.

Where do animals go when their tails falls off?

The retail store

Why doesn't Jesus like M&ampM's?

Because they fall through his hands.

Why did the girltree fall in love with the boy tree?

He was sappy

Why did Kevin's Ice cream fall down?

Because he was hit by a truck

Why did the clown wear loud socks?

A: So his feet wouldn't fall asleep.

How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs?

A: She fell out of the tree.

Why didn't anyone hear Helen Keller fall off a cliff?

She had mittens on.

Why was Roy Rogers upset when he fell off his horse?

He wanted a Trigger warning.

What is black and white and screams?

A. A nun falling down a flight of stairs.

What's the difference between a bag of cocaine and a seven year old?

Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out the window. EDIT: Damn it he was four

What did the earwig say as it fell down the stairs ?

Ear we go !

What's black and yellow and makes everyone laugh?

A school bus full of black people falling off a cliff.

What's the worst thing about having to kiss Grandma?

When the damn coffin lid falls and hits you in the head.

How many shags have you had?

He started counting then fell asleep.

Why can't Chinese Barbecue?

A: Because the rice falls through the grill

What did the hiker say when he fell in a pile of moss?

I'm not lichen this!'

What does an Eskimo do if his house falls down?

Igloos it back together.

Why did Eve want to move to New York ?

She fell for the Big Apple !

What's the difference between falling 2 ft and 200 ft?

200 ft: Aaaaaaaaa, bump 2 ft: Bump, aaaaaaaaa (Yes, it's an old, really old joke. Surprisingly haven't seen it here, yet.)

Why did the dog go to the doctor after a tomato fell on his head?

The tomato was in a can.

What is the difference between a bag of cocaine and a toddler?

Eric Clapton won't let a bag of cocaine fall out of the window.

What falls down faster from a tree, a leaf or an emo?

A leaf. The rope catches the emo.

What is the difference between falling from the 1st floor and from the 10th floor?

1st floor : Splat, aaaaaahhh 10th floor: aaaaahhhh, Splat

Why do you never see black people on cruise ships?

Because they won't fall for the same trick twice

Why did Suzie fall down the stairs?

I pushed her

Whatever happened to the bedbugs who fell in love?

A: They got married in the spring.

Why don black people go on cruises?

Pssshh, they're not falling for that one again.

Why doesn't Jesus like M&amp?

Ms? They keep falling through. If that's not offensive enough, replace it with black Jesus and skittles.

Why does a flamingo lift up one leg ?

Because if he lifted up both legs it would fall over !

Why did the man fall in love with the banana whilst on a London attraction?

Because it was a-peeling on the Eye.

When is the month when the most trees fall?

Sep-timber

Why did little Johnny fall off the swing?

he didn't have arms. Why did little Sarah fall off her bike Someone threw a fridge at her.

Why did the nuke switch course?

Because a girl on the ground said "I have a boyfriend" later that day the nuke fell into depression

Why did Vladimir fall off his bike?

He was rushin

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